


Like I Never Knew

by SilverMidnight



Category: Scrubs
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Tragedy, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, M/M, Oral Sex, Past Sexual Abuse, Sexual Content, past abusive relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-04
Updated: 2014-05-14
Packaged: 2018-01-14 12:19:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 25
Words: 45,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1266301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverMidnight/pseuds/SilverMidnight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Without realizing the Janitor, Glen Matthews, is reading his journal J.D. starts to describe very sexual dreams he keeps having. The Janitor finally snaps and confronts J.D. How does the Janitor deal knowing that there is no game? How does their relationship change?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Journal Entry

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

" _I didn't think you'd come," J.D. smiled closing the door behind the taller man._

" _If you're having second thoughts," the man shrugged._

" _No! I mean, I'm not having second thoughts. I just didn't think you liked me. Like that."_

" _Neither did I, but you're a hard man not to like."_

_A blush warmed J.D.'s cheeks at the mans words. In the back of his mind he knew that this was their first date and technically that hadn't even started, but when the older man's hand cradled his face J.D. leant forward._

_The first brush of lips was shy on both accounts, but the older man was not one for shyness. He angled the young doctor's head to the side and took a step closer. Everything in J.D. was screaming a warning, but the warmth coming from the body against his had him stepping forward as well._

_As the kisses grew more passionate, J.D. pulled away. Staring into the brown eyes a smile came to his lips before he moved forward to press their lips together once more. The taller man placed his hands on J.D.'s hips while his tongue pressed against the doctor's lips._

_Sighing in contentment J.D.'s arms wrapped around the other mans neck as their tongues danced. J.D. had thought that there would be a heated battle, but there was none of that. No, when the older mans tongue pushed into J.D.'s mouth he fell and let the man worship him._

" _Is this what you want?" the older man asked pulling away._

" _More than anything," J.D. replied placing a sweet kiss to the older mans lips, "I never knew how much I wanted this."_

" _What changed your mind?"_

" _It's silly."_

" _It's you. Of course it's silly."_

" _The day I tripped getting out of the elevator. You caught me. And then you said something and dropped me on my ass?"_

" _I remember."_

" _Right before you dropped me…Wow, that's not how you want to start a sentence. Before you dropped me, I had never felt so safe in someone's arms. It was amazing. I haven't been able to get that out of my mind. I keep dreaming of these arms around me again. Protecting me. Holding me. Loving me."_

_Instead of saying anything, the taller man swooped down and attached their lips once more. The kiss was deeper this time. Both parties letting their emotions go. A moan left J.D.'s lips as his hands came down and pushed the other mans shirt up. The kiss was broken long enough to lose both of their shirts._

_As the couple came back together the older mans lips went to the doctor's neck. Small, soft kisses pressed to the skin caused J.D.'s head to tip to the side letting the lips have more room to explore._

_Stopping right before his jaw the lips turned into teeth and gently nipped at the area. Blue eyes slipped shut at the feeling as a hand attempted to thread in the short hair. He'd do anything to keep those lips against his skin._

_Whimpering softly J.D. moved closer to the body before him pressing firmly against it. He could feel all the muscles pressing back his hands travel down the taller mans chest. The muscles were firm and slicked with sweat dripping slowly down his body getting soaked into his jeans. It was the most appetizing sight J.D. had seen in a while._

_The mouth on his neck slowly traveled down his body stopping at his collarbone. The older mans tongue poked out of his mouth lapping at J.D.'s sweaty skin. As much as the young door was enjoying the feeling he wanted…needed more. Grabbing the mans hips he walked them to his couch only stopping when he was seated in the taller mans lap._

_Not a word was spoken as J.D. was suddenly lying on his back with the older man above him. He was given the smallest, almost nonexistent smile before the older man moved down and started to suck on J.D.'s nipple. A high-pitched moan left the doctor as his back arched up. Suckling softly the taller man used it as a distraction to slick his finger with the lotion on the coffee table._

_He used the slick finger to massage the neglected nipple drawing more of those delicious noises from J.D. As he worked on the doctors chest J.D. whimpered softly his hands pulling on the man before he finally pulled back to look into his young lovers eyes. The blue eyes stared pleadingly into the brown eyes causing a soft laugh to come from his lips. J.D. pouted slightly at the noise causing the laughter to get louder. In retaliation J.D. used all of his strength to flip them until he was straddling the mans waist._

" _Is this supposed to be a punishment?" the man smirked._

" _No," J.D. shook his head, "This is supposed to be me getting things moving."_

" _Moving? What exactly are we moving towards?"_

" _I want you. I want you inside of me."_

" _Oh? Is that what you want?"_

" _Yes. Please. I need you in me."_

_The smirk grew darker as hands moved to the front of the doctor's jeans. Mewling happily J.D.'s hands joined the mans and they quickly finished disrobing. Groaning at the sight of the older man J.D. reached towards the lotion only to have his hands grabbed. The other man pinned the doctor's hands between their bodies while bringing him into a breath-taking kiss. Making a soft sound in the back of his throat J.D. hoped the man knew what he wanted._

_Another throaty chuckle came from the man as he took the lotion in his hand. J.D.'s heart started to pound in his chest as the idea of what they were going to do hit the young doctor. He wasn't going to stop or anything, but this was the first time that he realized he was going to get what he dreamed of for so long. At least that's what he thought until he felt the mans strong calloused hands tracing designs on his back and sides._

_Looking up J.D. saw the taller man had a confused look on his face almost as if he wasn't sure why the doctor was still there. Smiling softly J.D. placed small kisses to every inch of skin he could reach until he got to the mans collarbone. Smirking against the skin, he bit down hard enough to leave a mark before soothing it with his tongue._

" _That wasn't very nice," the man growled._

" _Neither is keeping me waiting," J.D. smiled kissing the area around the mark, "It's torturous."_

" _Torturous? Hmm…The can be arranged."_

_Before J.D. could respond, the man wrapped an arm under his bum and stood up. A squeak came from the young doctor as he wrapped his legs tightly around the mans waist. Dual moans came from the both of them when their cocks rubbed together at the movement. The man moved towards the bedroom a moment later dropping J.D. on the bed as soon as the door closed behind them._

_Crawling over J.D.'s lithe figure the taller man easily pinned the doctor's wrists above his body with one hand as the other swept over his side. The touch was so soft it was as if a bug was walking over his skin. A soft giggle came from J.D. as his ticklishness set it. Just as he was about to say something the man placed a kiss to each of J.D.'s nipples causing him to lose focus. How the man knew J.D. loved having his nipples played with was beyond him, but right now, he didn't really care._

_The kisses trailed down his stomach until the lips stopped at his navel. A tongue circled his belly button before pressing in. A soft groan fell from the mans lips as he brought his hands down. Placing them on his hips the older man moved further down until he was above J.D.'s erection. With a dark smirk, the man licked a stripe from the base of J.D.'s cock to the tip before pressing a sweet kiss to it._

_Groaning at the small motions J.D. let his head drop onto his pillow. He wanted more from the older man, but after years of working with the man, he knew better than to try that. Still, he couldn't stop his hips from moving forward at the thought of having those lips wrapped around him. Instead of doing that though the man moved back to look the young doctor straight in the eye._

_The confusion was still in the mans eyes, but now there was something else. Was it excitement? Alternatively, could it be amazement? Whatever it was J.D. was left panting as he pulled the man up and into a sloppy, but passionate kiss. It was like everything else that happened with the man. It was always so passionate, hard with a side note of dangerous destruction. It was wrong for this to be happening, for J.D. having come to the man first, but he couldn't leave. Not with the promise those brown eyes gave him._

" _Please?" J.D. whispered against the mans lips, "Give me…"_

" _Give you what?" the man questioned._

" _Give me everything."_

_That seemed to break the man because the kiss he gave J.D. was frantic. The doctor wasn't the only one that had been waiting. He wanted it just as much and from how quickly he was moving for a longer time. Still, with how question everything was moving when the slicked finger pressed against J.D.'s hole he realized just how careful the man was being._

_Grunting at the uncomfortable stretch of the mans fingers the younger man closed his eyes and tried to relax. He knew that it would be better for everyone if he did that, but in the back of his mind, he knew it would be painful. The man seemed to realize this too. He leant down and pulled a nipple into his mouth. The distraction was enough to relax J.D. Moans fell from his lips as the man sucked. As odd as it sounded that was one of J.D.'s favorite things. He didn't know why, but someone sucking his nipples was one of the most amazing feeling ever._

_Another finger joined first causing J.D. to wince, but a quick tug from the mans teeth had his attention. This continued until three fingers were thrusting and stretching the younger man. Gasps and moans were leaving J.D. with every labored breath. Each thrust and twist of the fingers driving the doctor mad until he was trying to trust back._

" _More," J.D. panted grinding down on the fingers._

_The man nodded his head and pulled his fingers out. J.D. whined softly at the loss, but soon was rewarded with the lube-slicked penis at his entrance. Without thinking the doctor tensed, but a hand soothingly rubbing over his chest making sure to flick his nipples had him relaxing before long. With slow, measured movements, the man pushed into J.D. until he was all the way in. J.D.'s head was turned to the side so the man couldn't see the pain filled tears he was holding back._

_Making sure his lower body was completely still the man pressed soft, innocent kisses to J.D.'s lips before moving up and kissing the tears away. A content sigh fell from the doctor and he slowly relaxed. Taking that as his cue the man pulled out slightly before moving back in. With each withdrawal the man pulled out further until only the head was inside. The movements didn't speed up or gain any strength. It was a slow, beautiful love making. Something J.D. normally loved. It also wasn't what he needed now._

_No, J.D. needed the passion that he always associated with the man. Of course, the was the first time that they had ever been in this situation, but soft and gentle was not the right thing for them. He just had no idea how he was supposed to tell the older man that. For the first time in all their years of knowing each other, J.D. was in control and he was at a complete loss, but he had to do something._

_With that in his head, J.D. took a deep breath and looked into the eyes of the man above him. The man gave him another almost nonexistent smile while J.D. was beaming at the man. The older mans eyes roamed over J.D.'s face and when their eyes locked; he had pulled out once more. As he slowly entered the doctor winked at the man and thrust up to meet him. A light burst behind J.D.'s eyes at the pleasured pain filled him._

_J.D.'s bliss was cut short when he heard a growl come from the taller man. His eyes opened and took in the sight before him. The man above him had his eyes clenched shut, sweat was gathering on his brow, muscles were shaking. He was holding himself back. It took a second, but the doctor realized he was doing this so he wouldn't hurt him. He was trying to protect J.D. And, for once, J.D. wanted no protection._

" _Not going to break," J.D. spoke calmly his hands roaming the chest until they came to stop at his shoulders._

" _You don't know what…" the man started._

" _Yes, I do. I know exactly what I'm asking for. I know the mean, hateful, cunning side of you. Now I want to see the other side. That doesn't mean you go gentle on me. Give me everything. Give me all you got."_

_J.D. barely got through his sentence before the man pulled out and thrust into his willing body. It wasn't rough in any sense, just deep. A loud keen came from J.D. as his nails dug into the mans shoulders. A growling sound was returned as the man lifted the doctor's hips for better access. It was perfect. J.D. felt like he was in heaven as he threw his head back and arched off the bed. The pace started to pick up and all too soon, the two bodies were slamming into each other._

_Reaching down J.D. wrapped a hand around himself. He knew that a few tugs and he'd be done, but he wanted this to last. He wanted more. Surging up he attacked the mans lips with a fever that was easily matched. Keeping their lips molded together, he tugged on his dick doing his best to match the thrusts. Before he could say anything, he felt his orgasm rip through his body. A scream broke lose as he fell back on the bed._

_His body was shaking as the older man thrust faster into him. The doctor knew he was going to finish soon so he opened his legs wider and let the man use him. For a moment, all he was doing was providing for his lover and it was something that made him smile. Feeling the thrusts become more erratic J.D. sleepily reached up and pressed a hand to the mans face. His lover's eyes locked with his causing him to smile._

" _Come on," J.D. whispered, "Fill me. Use me. This is all yours. You just have to take it."_

_A loud growl came from the man as his teeth sunk into the side of J.D.'s neck. His body shook as he rode through his orgasm. The blood rushing in his ears was almost too loud, but he was able to hear the most beautiful noise he'd ever hear. It was a noise that he'd work tirelessly everyday for the rest of his life to hear again. That noise…_

" _Oh. Janitor."_

The pink diary fell from work weathered hands smacking harshly into the floor. The Janitor had thought it would be funny to read the doctors diary once more. He'd at least get new material to make fun of him for. Never had he thought he'd be reading a detailed description of J.D.'s latest erotic dream. Of him…Of them…Together.

He'd already come to terms with his sexuality long ago. Usually he dated me, but there were a few women that caught his eyes over the years, but never before had he thought of the doctor sexually. He stuck to ways to torture the man. Apparently, he was the only one. How, after everything he did to the man, he wanted to be with him in anyway, but that's what the diary said. Unless…Yes, of course! It was a way to get back at him for everything. Right?


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

It had been two months since the Janitor first read that damn diary and everything had changed for the brown eyed man. He had always thought of the doctor as someone to pick on and torture, but now he couldn't get the man out of his head.

Night after night he'd find himself thinking about what he read in the diary. He'd end up imagining the words himself. Dreaming about whatever it was that the doctor had written.

And if he ended up not seeing the diary or there was no new entry he'd still not get a reprieve. His dreams were always filled with  _that man_  and it always ended the same way. What a good way to end too.

Then the Janitor would have to come to work and he'd see him and those dreams and entries would come into his mind. It was getting harder and harder for him not to make those dreams come true.

Every time he saw those blue eyes look at him in fear, yet excitement, or he saw that head of spiky brown hair he thought about everything he'd been seeing lately. The feeling would double and triple until he had to walk away before he did something stupid.

He didn't want that. The doctor was never meant to mean anything to him. He was an annoying pest that he used for entertainment. The idea of anything else was just wrong on too many levels.

No matter what he did though he couldn't stop the thoughts or even rein them in. He wanted the doctor in the worst way and there was nothing he could do about it. Not until he knew if the whole thing was just some ploy to get him back for everything he'd done.

It wasn't that he thought the doctor could pull off something like this, but he wouldn't be himself if he didn't at the very least consider it. Though the thought truly was laughable. There had to be something going on because him liking the Janitor in any way was ridiculous.

He was feared and that was the way he liked it. There was no reason for him to want it any other way. Okay, so J.D. wasn't a horrible looking man. He did have a long history of girlfriends for a reason.

Had he ever had a boyfriend? The diary had pointed out that he was bi-sexual, but it never said if he had been in a serious relationship with a man. Not that it was hard to figure out.

The boy was just so J.D. that it was impossible to believe that he'd have a one night stand. No, every relationship was a serious relationship and that was that. There was nothing else.

Was the older man willing to deal with that? An actual relationship with a person who held a lot against him, with good reason? Damn it, how did his thoughts always end up there? This was all just a joke.

Still the Janitor couldn't help but question that thought. If this was some sort of joke then he'd know about it. The doctor couldn't keep a secret to save his life. He'd have told someone and one of the people that wanted to see that little nuisance fail would have told him.

Nothing had gotten back to him though and that had the Janitor in a bad mood. He hated to be played in any way. Still that wasn't the worst part of what was happening. The worst part of the whole situation was that no matter what evil plans he came up with he couldn't bring himself to pull any pranks on the doctor.

Never before in his life had he had this problem. He had been doing things to people since he was a kid and he was never the victim, damn it! Then that mousse-haired overgrown child came into his life.

He knew the younger man would be an easy target the moment he laid eyes on him. Of course he made it so much easier than the Janitor could ever dream. Honestly it was such a beautiful sight to find someone that naïve to bully.

So why was it so different now? He had no desire to be with that  _man_  and he sure as hell didn't want to lose his victim. Wait, was this what he was playing at? Did he think that this would work?

He was trying to get out of their little game. He thought that if he confused the Janitor, flustered him, that all of this would magically go away. That he would be left alone once again.

Oh how he loved it when people underestimated him. It was always so much fun. For him. Even as he thought that though he knew that he still wasn't right. This was the one person in the hospital that knew what he was capable of.

The more he thought about the situation the worse things got. There had to be an explanation for why the doctor thought that writing those fake journal entries would be a good idea. The Janitor just had to stop and think about everything though.

Unless they weren't fake. Was it possible that the younger man had feelings for him? Well, they weren't exactly feeling so much as sexual dreams. That was completely different then feelings. In a normal person.

This was John Dorian. Nothing that man did was  _normal_ by any means. He could have feelings for the Janitor and he would never actually know because he was covering it up. Thinking it was just sex dreams.

Was J.D. as confused about this whole thing as the Janitor? No, he would have showed that at some point in time. The doctor was in no way good at hiding anything from anyone.

At least, that's what the Janitor thought. Was there any chance that the doctor was actually not what he thought? That there was a hidden side to the man that he didn't let anyone see?

This whole thing was starting to be too much for the older man. He never played the fool very well and the idea that someone like  _J.D._  was the one playing him was just adding salt to the wounds. Two months. That's all it took to do this to the Janitor and that was two months too many. He had to stop this, but how?

So far everything that he did went nowhere. Every plan stayed in his head and he had actually taken to avoiding the doctor because he wasn't up to par. He couldn't let him see what he was doing to him. He was stronger than this.

Except he wasn't. If he was stronger than this than that man-child wouldn't be playing his dreams. Not to say they weren't good dreams, they were far from bad, but it wasn't going to end well.

The dreams were amazing. Though he found the best part being he dreamt of the doctors words and who knew he was as…Passionate as he was. If they ever were to have sex it would be a good experience.

Wait, what was he thinking? There was nothing in this world that would make the Janitor be with J.D. This situation was just making him insane. That was all. Because there was no way he wanted that lithe body pressed against his as he…No!

This needed to stop. There was no way that any of this was real. All the diary entries were a prank to get him back for everything he'd done. There was no reason for him to even think about this any further. Nothing was ever going to happen between the two of them.

And wasn't it sad that the idea that nothing would ever happen actually saddened him? He didn't want the doctor. He truly didn't and as long as he repeated that lie to himself, and didn't jump the man, everything would be completely fine.

Now that he had those thoughts in his mind though he couldn't help but wonder. Yes, the doctor was horrible at relationships, but he was a good person and…He was actually wondering what a relationship with the man would be like. He was defiantly screwed.

But that didn't mean he'd have to be screwed alone. If J.D. was going to play him then he was going to drag him down as well. It was only fair and if the doctor got hurt in the process then that was all the better. It was his fault they were in this situation in the first place.

Which was how the Janitor found himself stalking the doctor into one of the on-call rooms. This was going to end now because if this went on any longer then  _someone_  was going to lose  _their control_  and  _someone else_  would know just how  _big_  he was.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

A sigh fell from J.D.'s lips as he cracked his neck. He had felt so stressed lately and it was really starting to take a toll on the young man. Don't get him wrong he loved his job, but there were some days he wanted to shove his head in a hole and ignore the world.

There was so much pain in a hospital and it was his job to take care of people. To make them feel better. Most days that would be enough, but there were some that made him want to pound his skull into a wall. Why did he think being a doctor would be a good idea?

Sadly, his mood today had nothing to do with the hospital. No, he was too caught up in thoughts of a certain Janitor that hated him. For something he didn't even do! The man was crazy.

It wasn't like he had meant to develop a crush on the older man and he sure as hell didn't want one. Because he was crazy! Okay, so no one believed him when he said that, but that didn't make it any less true.

Every day since he had started working at the hospital had been filled with the Janitor proving that to him. It was just a fact. Which is what made this stupid little crush all the worse.

He really did have horrible taste in men, didn't he? He always had. Given he had only actually dated three guys in his life, but he had dated each of them for at least three months each.

It never ended well. Two of the guys were just in it for the sex and the last one. Well, he never did like thinking about that time, but he was happy to know that his brother came through for him that time.

He couldn't help himself though. Even if he knew everything that the Janitor did. Every situation that the two of them had been in said that this was a horrible idea. That it would just end in him getting hurt in some way. Badly.

That still didn't stop him from wanting. At least not now that he knew what those calloused hands felt like on him. So strong and warm. Like they were made to protect as well as they destroyed. They were the things dreams were made of. Quite literally as it turned out because J.D. couldn't stop dreaming about them.

Of course none of the dreams were innocent in any way. He was a sexually active man and he felt no shame about that, but this was boarding on ridiculous. Night after night he'd find himself lost in a dream world where he'd be writhing in torturous pleasure doled out by those amazing hands.

That was what made all of this so wrong. He shouldn't be dreaming of the pleasure those hands could bring him when he knew the pain. The Janitor was an evil and cruel man that J.D. should want nothing to do with, but oh did he want.

Those hands circling his waist pulling him back against his muscled body. Running up his lithe chest. Fingers slowly unbuttoning the shirt he was wearing as a deep voice growled against his neck.

No! This was the Janitor he was thinking about. The man that did everything in his power to hurt him everyday since he started working there! He couldn't have a crush on that man. Even if it was just physical.

Yeah, just physical. Since when has that ever actually happened with J.D.? He knew that he wanted a relationship. After awhile he would mess things up, but before that he wanted the whole nine yards. Even if it was with the older man.

Then there was the fact that he was always trying to see the good it people. Maybe he was wrong, but would it possibly be worth it to see if the older man had a good side? And then get hurt by that side too? The doctor really hated his brain sometimes.

He knew that he was messed up. That he was naïve and stupid about almost everything in his life. How he hadn't gotten even more hurt by the world was actually surprising to everyone including himself.

Trusting people that didn't deserve it. Finding a mentor in a man that basically hated him. Wanting a man that had proven time and time again to have no soul when it came to him.

Even with knowing that he couldn't help but think that it was all just an act. That there was a wall that he had to get through to get to know the man. Once he got to know him then J.D. would see just how good he was.

This was my he hated himself sometimes. He knew in his head that all of this was wrong, stupid, but at the end of the day he always ended up listening to his heart. He really should work on that.

In the end it came down to the fact that he didn't want a relationship with the man. Except for that little portion of his mind that was a masochist. And, of course, the portion that thought he could help the Janitor. And the portion that knew the Janitor could protect him when everything just got to be too much. But he never listened to those sides of his mind. A lot.

Why did he always have to get himself into these situations? Couldn't he just find someone to grow old with? He just wanted to be able to find love and instead he has a string of horrible relationships leading to liking a man that made his life hell!

The only thing that made this somewhat bearable was that he wasn't attracted to that side of him Thankfully. No, there was a few things that came to his mind when he thought of him, but that wasn't one.

The biggest one that came to mind was the look in his eyes whenever he was plotting something. Alright so it was somewhat about him being completely evil. It was just so hard to ignore that fire in his eyes whenever something he plotted succeeded. It always ended up sending a shiver up his spine.

That was what he wanted directed at him. He wanted that look to set him on fire with every glance. Something he knew he'd get from the Janitor if they ever did get together. Which sounded better and better the more the doctor thought about it.

Not that was just what he wanted. No, J.D. was a romantic at heart. He wanted lazy mornings, late night talks, making dinner together. He wanted the whole thing. He just wanted the best of both worlds and for some reason his brain thought the Janitor could provide that. How the hell it came up with that thought was beyond him.

None of this really made sense to him. Out of all the men in the hospital everyone thought he'd end up with Dr. Cox. Instead he truly just saw the man as a mentor. There were no sexual feeling between them. At least on his side there weren't any.

J.D. would pick crushing on the Todd before he even considered the Janitor. He felt no shame in thinking the Todd was attractive. He wasn't smart, but he was hot. Which is where it ended.

Then there was the Janitor. The only thing between J.D. and the Janitor was hatred and fear. At least that's what it used to be. Now it was one-sided sexual tension and hatred and fear. Because of all of that he decided to write his dreams down. Anything to get some kind of relief from the tension in his body.

The writing did help some, he was told he'd make a good writer, but mostly it gave him a chance to relive his dreams. They weren't sorted or particularly kinky or anything like that, but the emotions that they drug out of him were amazing. If only he had a real relationship like that.

But no, that wasn't how the world worked. People dreamt of fake lives and threw themselves into them with all their heart and ended up with nothing to show for their lives except for a 'How not to…' Guide. Something he was slowly becoming an expert on.

And as odd as it sounded that wasn't even the strangest part of the whole thing. No, that would be the fact that the Janitor had started to ignore him. Two months and there were no pranks, jokes, or even a simple acknowledgement of his presence. It was like he didn't exist anymore. That shouldn't hurt as much as it did.

It was just a little crush. There was no reason for him to care whether or not the Janitor could barely stand to say a simple 'You're a jerk' to him. It was just a crush and eventually telling himself that would make everything okay because none of this mattered if it was just a crush.

Why did he have to get so attached to someone he could never have so quickly? Seriously, did he have some kind of medical condition that just made it impossible for him to actually have a functioning relationship? He really needed a vacation.

Letting out another sigh the young doctor put his pen down and gathered his paperwork. Once his desk was organized he made his way to the closest on-call room. He had decided to spend a few of his off hours taking care of his paperwork and he had lost track of time. By now there was no point in him going home, but he did need to take a little while to relax before he went insane.

He nodded to one of the other doctors as they left, but didn't really pay attention. It wasn't like any other doctor was going to fault him for being out of it. It was something that happened to every doctor on many occasions. This just happened to be for a totally different reason.

He was caught up in thoughts of the dream he knew he was going to have. There was no way that he wasn't going to now, but he did hope that no one actually heard or saw anything while he was sleeping.

A sigh fell from his lips as he ran a hand over his face. How had sex dreams end up being one of the most depressing things in his life? Yeah he was completely and utterly screwed.

At the end of the day, this was the most he was ever going to get and he was just going to have to deal with that. No matter how much he didn't want to and he would figure out if did wanted to or not. He was just a little overworked and confused right now.

Feeling a wave of sadness hit him the doctor closed his eyes tightly and hoped that this all would end soon. He couldn't handle much more of these dreams. It was all getting to be too much. Though being ignored was so much worse. He, as sad as it sounded, hoped the Janitor stopped this. He just wanted things to go back to the way things were before all this happened.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

"Is this your idea of a joke?" a voice growled behind J.D. in the on-call room causing the man to let out a yelp.

The young doctor attempted to turn around only to be pushed into a wall. A fear filled whimper slipped from his lips as he felt a tall muscular body press against his back. He knew that he was in trouble now. Whomever was against him was pissed at him and if this wasn't a vulnerable position he didn't know what was.

Strong hands spun him around so he came face to face with the Janitor. This wasn't the first time the older man had done something like this, but it felt different somehow. J.D. couldn't figure it out until his eyes traveled down to the diary that was clutched angrily in the hand of the other man.

The blood drained from the doctors face as his wide blue eyes traveled back up to the Janitor's. He had seen anger in the mans eyes before, but this was different. There was something in his eyes that he was trying hard to hide. Too hard. With the thought that either way he wasn't going to make it out of the room without at least some blood loss J.D. moved forward pressing his lips to the now frozen Janitor.

The one-sided kiss only lasted a few second before J.D. pulled back ready to take whatever punishment the older man was ready to dole out. The two men stood there in silence for almost a full minute until brown eyes collided with blue. They locked together for another minute the silence almost becoming deafening.

J.D. watched his diary fall to the floor while the hand came up to fist his hair dragging him into a kiss. Feeling the Janitor's lips pressed firmly against his own. J.D.'s hands came up to grip the front of his shirt. It was like everything he had wanted and more. He just prayed that this wasn't another one of his dreams.

"Is this a joke?" Janitor questioned breaking the kiss, "Is what you wrote a way to get me back?"

"You know I'm not that devious," J.D. shook his head, "No, Janitor, it wasn't a joke. I meant everything I wrote. I can't stop thinking, dreaming, about you. As hard as it is to believe I'm not gay. I am bi-sexual though. I'm just extremely selective of my men so I've only been with a few guys before.

"And being  _selective_  you decide to develop a crush on the guy that makes your life hell?"

"Actually, it's…Umm…You're just so…I can't help but feel so turned on when I see the fire in your eyes. It's how I want you to look at me as you fuck me against this wall."

Brown eyes dilated as the words slipped easily from the doctors lips. J.D.'s voice had deepened slightly as his fists tightened on the Janitor. A soft growl unconsciously came from the older mans throat as he crashed their lips together once more. In the back of his mind the Janitor knew that this wouldn't end well, but then J.D.'s body arched against his and he couldn't bring himself to care.

Slowly running his hand down the doctors body the Janitor moaned at the lithe figure. J.D. wasn't muscular in anyway. So weak and fragile physically. Oh, but that was more than made up for in his mental and emotional strength. It was something to be jealous over. If Janitor was a lesser man he would be. No, he liked that J.D. cared and, like the doctor, he liked seeing the fire in the younger mans eyes.

J.D. broke the kiss his eyes darting to see if the door was locked. Once that was confirmed he made quick work unbuttoning the Janitor's uniform top. Excited hands trembled as each button slid from its hole. Months of wet dreams and fantasies were racing through his mind causing his breaths to come out in pants. How he longed to feel the mans body pressed against his.

The top fell onto the floor the undershirt joining it before long. J.D. moaned at the sight of his muscled, slightly hairy chest. With quick movements the doctors pulled the Janitor into a heated kiss his nails raking down the mans back hard enough to leave bloody scratches in their wake. The pain had the Janitor groaning lowly.

A scrubs top and long sleeved shirt joined the Janitors on the floor before J.D.'s body was easily lifted. Low moans was accompanied by deep groans as their erections rubbed together. A hand trailed down J.D.'s back coming to rest on his ass holding him tightly against him.

Using that hand the older man pushed J.D. tighter against him. A low moan had the Janitor repeating the action. He meant to only hand the doctor thrusting and rubbing against him, but with each movement his self-control slipped. Moving swiftly he sat on the edge of one of the beds with J.D. in his lap.

Blunt nails dug into the Janitor's scalp bringing his head back to J.D.'s. Lips moved passionately together both men lost in the feeling of the other. Hands pushed scrubs bottoms and underwear down leaving J.D. completely naked. The doctors hands moved to the older mans belt and fumbled to remove it and the rest of his clothing.

Lifting the smaller man up slightly the Janitor pushed his pants off the rest of the way. Once the clothing was off everything seemed to slow. Both men had been running on pure emotions and the act of stripping gave them enough time to think about what was going to happen if they went down this road together.

J.D. knew that he wanted this. He had been dreaming about it for so long, but he had no idea what the Janitor wanted. The man had made the doctors life hell since he first stepped into the hospital. It was completely possible that he was doing this to mess with his mind.

With a shaky hand J.D. took the Janitor's erection in his fist and slowly started to move it up and down. A soft groan fell from the older mans throat his eyes fluttering shut. J.D. was startled when he was flipped so he was lying on the bed. A gasp fell from his lips his eyes moving to try to lock with the man above him.

"How far are you willing to go?" the Janitor growled from over J.D.

"You've read my diary," J.D. shrugged wrapping his arms around the older mans shoulder, "I'll take whatever you give. On one condition."

"What's that?"

J.D. smirked slightly pulling the man above him into a kiss. His tongue easily pushed past the Janitor's lips coaxing the other mans tongue into his mouth. He moaned softly when the man got the hint and his tongue eagerly mapped J.D.'s. Shifting slightly the doctor lined their dicks up and thrust. The Janitor bit J.D.'s lip and ground down.

Breaking the kiss J.D. trailed his lips to the Janitor's ear. He nipped and sucked at it before breaking away. Soft pants and low groans filled the small room before the doctor stopped moving completely. The Janitor groaned in frustration and ground down harder, but it felt so different knowing the younger man wasn't moving.

"Tell me your name," J.D. whispered in his ear, "I want you real name echoing in this room when you make me moan."

"Glen," the Janitor growled out against J.D.'s neck, "My name is Glen."

J.D. made a small humming noise in the back of his throat before arching his back the name a breathless moan. Glen grabbed J.D.'s wrists in one hand and pinned them above his head while the other took hold of their erections in the other. The young doctor's held tilted backwards giving the Janitor the opportunity to bite and suck a mark into the sensitive skin.

Whimpers came from the younger man as he worked his hips. It was such and addicting feeling having the older man pressed against him. A knot tightened in his stomach causing his pants to come out as breathy moans. It wasn't long before he was spilling his seed over himself and Glen's hands. The Janitor not far behind him.

"Not a…Not a one-off?" J.D. questioningly panted out.

"No," Glen responded roughly, "Not a one-off."

"Just sex?"

Glen looked down at the younger man before rolling off and thinking about what he asked. It was a valid question and one that needed to be answered sooner rather than later. J.D. propped himself up his blue eyes staring into brown.

"No," Glen offered without meaning to, "I mean…"

"Do you…I mean…We could… Umm…"

"Date?"

"It's not like it would ruin our relationship. I'm off Thursday night?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

It wasn't until three days later that their first date came around. And saying both of them were nervous was an understatement. There was a lot on the line for everyone involved no matter what J.D. had said. This was going to change everything even though they weren't close.

Neither man knew exactly where they wanted this to go. In their minds they knew that this was so incredibly stupid. Still, they couldn't continue to ignore the dreams or the night in the on-call room. It would drive them both insane until they at least tried to make it something more.

At the end of the day though the doctor found the he was wary of everything that was happening. The Janitor said that it wasn't a one night stand, but part of him believed that maybe it was for the best if it was. At least then they could take that and walk away without anyone getting hurt.

Then there was the idea that it was all just some elaborate joke. That was something he'd do. The taller man had made it his mission to make his life hell. This would be one surefire way of doing that.

After all those thoughts circled in his head J.D. would then remember the Janitor demanding to know if his diary was a joke. As if the doctor was the one trying to hurt him now. It was a little weird to say the least, but he had been genuinely worried the entries were faked.

For some reason that didn't help J.D. feel better. If someone like  _the Janitor_ was worried about this whole thing then what hope did any of this actually have? Maybe it never should have began, but he had to get those damn dreams out of his head, especially since they were of the older man.

He knew he shouldn't like the man. He was evil and crazy. And hadn't just hurt the doctor before. but had gotten off on hurting him. It was just begging for him to get into another horrible relationship that could only end in the worst possible way.

Yet here he was. Trying to figure out if he looked better in sky blue or dark gray because he really wanted to go on this date. Even more he really wanted this date to turn out well. He just had to know if it was all in his head or if they could possibly be a real couple.

Of course Glen wasn't doing much better at his house. The man didn't really socialize with people outside of work. Everyone thought that he was just a little too weird to hang out with. Something he was sure the doctor knew. In fact, J.D. had seen one of the darker sides of him, not the darkest, but close.

Yet he wanted to date him. How did that make any sense? Was the kid a glutton for punishment or something? No, that wasn't it. He was too nice to want to be in a bad relationship because he thought he deserved the pain. That was more something the Janitor would do.

It was completely possible that he was wrong though. He had thought J.D. was straight, no matter how much he made fun of him. He had also thought that there was no chance the doctor would want anything to do with him outside of the hospital. He was wrong there as well. Maybe he didn't know the doctor as well as he thought.

That idea had his lips twitching up. He did love getting surprised by people and the doctor was a good one to get surprised by. He was weird…Honestly, weird in the best kind of way. At least that's what the taller man was beginning to notice.

Quickly both men realized that all the dating rules they had learned had to be thrown out of the window and they were going to have to make up a few of their own. It seemed like a lot of work for one date that was probably going to end worse than everything other bad date they had had before.

Brown eyes moved to the alarm clock and saw that it was time to pick up the doctor. Moving quickly the Janitor pulled on a white shirt and double checked his keys and wallet. Once he was sure he was ready he climbed in his van and started his way to J.D.'s.

First dates were always difficult, but this seemed to be worse and it hadn't even started yet. Both men were dreading the date as much as they were looking forward to it. They were tearing down the very idea of it before it happened. Yet, for some reason, the idea of cancelling the date hadn't crossed either of their minds.

The van pulled up to J.D.'s apartment building not ten minutes later. Glen took a deep breath to steel himself before going to the front door and nodding to one of the tenants as they left. In the back of his mind he knew he should have J.D. buzz him up, but he was afraid the doctor would tell him to leave if he did that.

Walking up to J.D.'s front door the Janitor let himself go over the date plans once more. A bite to eat at this small restaurant he knew no one else at the hospital knew about. That was it. Sweet and simple. He thought that was the best plans for their first, and probably last, date.

Hearing firm knocking on the front door J.D. froze. His eyes quickly darted to the closest clock and saw that the Janitor was right on time. There goes the idea that he was going to be stood up after getting his hopes up. The doctor wasn't sure that was a good thing or not.

With the knowledge that this could still be some sort of joke J.D. triple checked that he had his phone, keys, and wallet. He might like the Janitor, but he didn't actually trust him just yet. Once he was sure he had everything he went to the front door and opened it.

Both men stood there for a moment taking in the appearance of their date. Glen was in a white shirt and black slacks while J.D. was in a dark gray shirt and new jeans. It was a first for them to be seeing the other man out of their work clothes. They couldn't say they were disappointed with what they saw.

"Hey, Jan…" J.D. started before taking a deep breath, "Hey Glen."

"J.D.," the Janitor nodded, "Ready?"

"Yeah. I'm ready."

The walk to the van and drive to the restaurant were filled with an awkward silence. When they were finally seated at their table J.D. stared out the window with an appletini in front of him while the Janitor drank his beer slowly.

A word still hadn't been uttered by the time the appetizer had been placed in front of them. Glen let out a soft sigh and looked at the doctor. J.D. looked so put out by the failure of the date. And, as odd as it sounded, the Janitor really hated seeing that look on his face.

"Not what you were expecting?" Glen questioned taking a sip of beer.

"Actually," J.D. smiled sadly finally looking at the Janitor, "It's exactly what I was expecting. I just hoped I was wrong."

"Always so hopeful."

"Not always. I think it's something I grew into."

"Like your personality?"

Glen froze when he said that. He knew that tone in his voice even if the doctor didn't. He was…He was flirting with the younger man. Actually flirting. When had the idea of flirting come into his mind and why did he think that it was a good idea to act on it?

The silence continued for a few seconds more before J.D. started laughing. The laugh wasn't musical by any means, but it was true and the Janitor found himself wanting more. He actually truly wanted more of the young doctor sitting across from him.

That small bout of laughter was all it took. J.D. turned completely to Glen and actively making this a date. It was a little strange to have such a dramatic turn in their relationship, but it was working out quite nicely so far.

The date was filled with J.D. doing most of the talking, but Glen was paying attention and pointing out how childish the younger man was. It would have felt like an insult, but every once in awhile the doctor saw the Janitor's lips twitch into a smile and that made it all worth it.

Sadly, it wasn't long before the men were walking up to J.D.'s apartment. The doctor had pointed out that he didn't have to walk him up, but a gruff 'shut up' quieted him. Unlike before though the silence encompassing the couple wasn't awkward.

"Here we are," J.D. said stopping in front of his door.

"I see that," Glen smirked.

"Sarcastic ass. I had a really good time, Glen."

"So did I."

"We can do it again. Right? I mean…How does coffee sound? Tomorrow after work?"

Glen's smirk darkened slightly his hand coming to cup the back of the younger mans neck and pull him into a kiss. It was nothing like they had shared before. Just their lips brushing over each others. So simple, but it left so much to the imagination. J.D. had to pull away before he thought it was a good idea to bring the other man inside with him.

"Not now?" Glen teased.

"I'm not that easy," J.D. glared half-heartedly.

"You forget. I've read your diary. Yes, you are and yes, we will. See you after work, Scooter."


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

J. D. placed the last of the silverware on the table before taking a step back. Tonight was his and Glen's eighteenth date and both hoped they knew where this night would end. J.D. wasn't joking when he said he wasn't easy though and Glen was figuring that out.

It had only been three months since their first date and both men were going slower than they ever had before. It seemed appropriate though considering how their relationship had started off.

Oddly enough things actually had changed a little at work. The Janitor still was a constant presence and the pranks were still there, but the meaning behind them had changed. He wasn't trying to hurt J.D. anymore. He was just teasing him now.

It wasn't nearly as hard as they thought it would be to be in a relationship. Glen was no longer trying to hurt the younger man while J.D. was getting over the fear he felt whenever the Janitor or his friends were around.

Saying it was hard was an understatement. Glen would look at the innocent doe eyed boy and want to harm him once more and J.D. would flinch away from the older man whenever he moved to quickly towards him.

This always led to them questioning whether or not their relationship was actually going to work out, but something stopped them from breaking up. So they took things slowly, but they knew that it was time to move forward.

What was more forward than a dinner at J.D.'s place followed, hopefully, by  _dessert_  in the bedroom. It was what the relationship was working towards and, with three firm knocks on his door, it was what was happening. Now.

Taking a deep breath J.D. wiped his suddenly sweaty hands on his jeans before going to the door and opening it. On the other side stood Glen in a pair of simple blue jeans and a dark green T-shirt. It was a very casual look that had J.D.'s heart speeding up. They were now in the  _casual_  part of their relationship. When did that happen?

A bottle of wine was in weathered hands and that got the doctor's mind wandering. He knew what those hands felt like. At least he did a little. That night in the on-call room was not enough. He wanted them pressed everywhere. Them gripping tightly as they manipulated his body into whatever position the Janitor wanted. Their warmth seeping into him as the calloused fingers mapped out the most sensitive parts of his body.

Hearing a soft chuckle J.D.'s eyes focused once more as a blush bloomed on his cheeks. With a shake of his head Glen pressed the wine into his lovers hands while brushing past him and into the apartment. The silence was calm as the doctor shut and locked his front door before leading the Janitor into the kitchen.

"Shrimp," Glen nodded to the stove.

"Yeah," J.D. replied putting the wine down, "Shrimp scampi, French bread, and some grilled asparagus."

"Went all out for me?"

"Actually, this is my specialty. I love shrimp."

"You do order it a lot when we get dinner."

"I know. I try to branch out and try new things, but I like what I like."

"So do I."

Glen's voice dropped an octave showing J.D. that he wasn't talking about food. The younger man swallowed roughly before motioning to the plates on the table. The older man handed the plates over as asked making sure to press himself tightly against J.D.'s back. A shutter ran through the doctor's body when he felt the long, muscled body pressed against his. It took all his self-control to, with shaky hands, dish out their dinner and go to the table.

Glen had a satisfied smirk on his lips as he took a seat across from the doctor. He loved doing things like that. At least, he loved the reaction he got. The slight hitch in the younger mans breath. The shutters that consumed his body. How his eyes dilated ever so slightly. The feeling was absolutely intoxicating.

The couple spent the dinner talking about their favorite things. From J.D.'s love of shrimp to Glen's love of potato soup with bacon and so much more. By the time the plates were empty and half the bottle of wine was empty both men knew more about each other than they thought would happen. It was as if, for the time being, all the concern and fear about the relationship was gone.

_Is this was it would be like?_  J.D. questioned in his mind. The new, fragile relationship was so different than he ever dreamed and loved every second of it. This was what he wanted. If the small smile on Glen's face was anything to go by this was exactly what he wanted too. With that thought in his head J.D. slowly stood up and, with the Janitor's help, put everything away.

"Glen," J.D. started swallowing roughly before taking a deep breath, "Do you…Is this…Are we really going to do this?"

Glen stared at the doctor in silence for a few beats. Wanting J.D. was still so new to him. Honestly, he had no idea what he was supposed to say or do, but that didn't seem to bother his body as it pulled the lithe frame to him. J.D. easily complied with the older man's wants until they were pressed together.

When blue eyes locked with brown J.D. found himself being pulled into a kiss. This wasn't the first time they'd kissed. Far from it. This kiss was different though. This kiss was going to led somewhere before a cold shower. With that thought bouncing in both men's brains J.D. linked one hand with Glen's and led him to his bedroom.

The door closed behind the men leaving them in silence. Breaking away from the older man J.D. took a few steps towards his bed while taking in a deep breath. As odd as it was J.D. felt more nervous than he had before. He hadn't had sex with a lot of men before, but this wasn't his first time. It felt so different than that though. Almost more meaningful.

Turning around the doctor looked at Glen and saw how relaxed he seemed. He knew that wasn't the case though. The Janitor was just as nervous as J.D. That thought had the younger man moving to Glen until they were toe to toe. Wrapping his arms around the Janitor's neck the doctor smiled. The Janitor smiled back his hands going to J.D.'s waist.

Slowly leaning up the doctors lips pressed innocently against the Janitor's. Everything started so sweetly. Their lips working together until both men were panting. Glen took a step forward leading J.D. to his bed. Feeling his knees hit the edge the doctor tightened his grip and brought the older man down with him.

A soft chuckle left the Janitors lips as he carded a hand through his hair. Using the hand to tilt the doctors head to the side Glen pressed his lips to J.D.'s neck trailing kisses to his collarbone. Smirking against the skin the older man opened his mouth and latched his teeth onto the man. A moan fell from J.D. as his hands came up to his lovers back nails digging in.

"Glen," J.D. whimpered as a tongue lavished over the bite mark, "Oh…More."

Moving away from his neck Glen pushed his hands under J.D.'s shirt and pulled it off before removing his own. As he leant over his young lover he made sure their chests pressed together tightly. A sigh came from Glen as he was drug into another kiss. Passion had both men working to remove the rest of their clothing.

J.D. broke the kiss and buried his head in Glen's neck as a leg wrapped around the older mans waist. Flipping the man onto his back J.D. placed his lips on the Janitor's nipple and kissed it gently before his tongue darted out to circle it. Low groans sent shivers down the doctors spin that a firm hand trailed. The hand was joined by the other and started to kneed J.D.'s ass.

A soft moan vibrated through the doctor as he tried to figure out if he should press into the hands or the body below his. The thought fell from his mind as a dry finger went between his cheeks. Pushing up so he was sitting J.D. reached into his nightstand drawer and pulled out a condom and lube.

"Someone would think you were planning this, Dorian," Glen chuckled breathlessly.

"Someone would be right," J.D. smirked.

"Is that so?"

"Oh yeah. And I'm hoping that someone will…Show me what I've been missing?"

Blue eyes brightened at the images his mind conjured, but he was quickly pulled out of his imagination by a click of a bottle opening. His eyes darted to the lube mouth suddenly dry when he saw two fingers already slicked. Breathing picked up as a hand pushed so he was pressed against the Janitor.

Feeling the fingers slowly part his cheeks. J.D. looked down and saw the brown eyes blown wide. A slick finger swirled around his rim before slowly pushing in. The brown eyes darted over the doctors face looking for any signs of discomfort. When he didn't find any he pulled the finger out and pushed back in.

It wasn't until J.D. was pushing back that Glen let a second finger push in. Scissoring the fingers open the Janitors eyes slipped shut as he listened to the noises coming from his lover. Moans and sighs filled the room as the doctor fucked back on the fingers. It wasn't long until a third figure was being pushed in and J.D. was panting against Glen's chest.

Pulling his fingers out Glen rolled the condom on as J.D. sat there. The room was filled with broken moans as the Janitor moved J.D. around so he was on his hands and knees. The doctor dug his nails into his blanket as Glen slicked his penis and slowly slipped into his young lover. His jaw clenched as he tried not to pound into J.D.

The doctor winced at the stretch his hands tightening in the bedspread. Seeing this movement Glen ran his hands up and down J.D.'s back and sides soothing him. Taking in deep breaths the younger man focused on the hands and tired to relax. It had been so long since he had anything but his own fingers inside of him.

Taking in one more breath J.D. slowly rocked backwards. A low groan came from the Janitor at this movement, but he didn't allow himself to move. No, he knew that the younger man was simply testing the water and he was going to wait. He had more self-control than most people thought. His eyes fluttered shut as the rocking moved faster.

"Glen," J.D. whined, "Please. Move."

A deep growl slipped from the Janitor's lips as he pulled out slightly and pushed back in. It wasn't a big movement and that had J.D. whining in the back of his throat. He wanted more. He had dreamt of this moment for so long and this was not what it was like. Groaning he turned his head to Glen and opened his mouth when he saw how the Janitor looked.

The older man looked like he was doing everything to control himself. It was then that the doctor started to fall in love with the older man. He knew that it wasn't good to fall so early in the relationship, but he was so happy feeling it. He just hoped that Glen would eventually feel the same way.

As Glen pulled out once more J.D. dropped his head and pushed back. The older man stopped his movements when J.D. did that and for a moment the doctor was afraid that he'd leave. Instead he felt strong hands pull him up so his back was against Glen's chest. Letting his eyes slip shut as the Janitor was pressed more firmly into him the blue-eyed man missed the devilish smirk on his lips.

Placing one hand on the doctors hip and the other on his jaw Glen directed J.D. into a kiss. Their lips moved slowly together as the younger man tried to get the Janitor to move. Frustration built inside J.D. and just as he broke the kiss to demand him to move Glen pulled out and thrust into the lithe body.

A loud moan ripped through J.D. as Glen set a fast pace. Each thrust had the bed rocking into the wall and J.D. was suddenly glad his neighbors were out of town. Throwing his head back the doctor panted against Glen's neck while he wrapped a hand around his erection. He knew he wasn't going to last very long and tightened his grip.

Seeing that his young lover was so close to the edge Glen switched his angle hoping to find the bundle of nerves that would push the man over. A soft yell filled the room J.D.'s hips stuttering at the filling of his prostate being hit. Smirking the Janitor speed up making sure to hit that spot.

Loud moans and broken pleas came from J.D. before he felt himself finally be drug under by his orgasm. He tightened around Glen causing the man to deepen his thrusts. As he slowly came down from his high he could hear grunts from the man behind him. Sighing softly he angled he head and pulled the man into a kiss as his movements became more frantic.

"Come on, Glen," J.D. muttered against his lips, "Let me have it. Let go."

Hearing J.D.'s soft voice Glen shut his eyes tightly and did as the younger man said. He rode through his own orgasm filling the condom with his seed. Slowly his movements stopped and he pulled out making sure to fall to the side. Soft hands tugged the condom off and cleaned both men off before silence once again filled the room.

Brown eyes slide open only to find J.D. kneeling above him looking down with a contemplative look his lower lip between his teeth. Glen watched as his lover slowly laid down beside him pulling his blankets over them. They laid a distance away before J.D. moved over the rested his head on the Janitor's chest.

"Is this okay?" J.D. whispered his voice soft and shaky with uncertainty.

"Yeah," Glen answered an arm wrapping around the man shoulders pressing the warm body closer to him, "It's okay."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

A soft hum filled the lounge as J.D. read over a patients forms. Today was a good day. He and Glen had been officially dating for five months and were starting to discuss coming clean to their friends about everything.

They were only holding back because the Janitor thought they needed more time. That they needed to be absolutely sure that this was what they wanted. Telling everyone and then having everything blow up in their faces didn't sound all that fun.

Of course J.D. knew that his lover was hiding something, but for once he decided not to go looking for a fight. He wanted everything to turn out right for once in his love life.

Still, even that wasn't enough to dampen his mood. He had been smiling and happy for the past week, but he couldn't help it. He had woken up to Glen's arms holding him tightly almost every morning.

In truth it was a little difficult to do that since they started dating. J.D. was constantly being called back to work or having to work overtime and sometimes he was so tired he'd just fall into bed and not get up until he had to.

Luckily for him the Janitor understood that. He never got upset when the doctor had to cancel a date or didn't go to his place after work. Just that was enough to send him smiling all day.

The only downside of his good mood was that everyone noticed. His friends were asking questions and demanding answers, or in Dr. Cox's case asking if he could be a flower girl at his wedding. That was a disturbing image. Turns out the older doctor  _does not_ look good in a blush colored knee high sleeveless dress.

He had managed to keep them off his back though. It took a lot of convincing and a little lying to do that, but he knew that it had to be done. He and Glen would announce it when they both were ready. Which made having Carla as a friend a bad thing. How she hadn't gotten him to talk was beyond him.

A soft chuckle spilled from J.D.'s lips as he stretched his hands over his head. He had been sitting at the table for almost three hours now. It was always surprising to him how much paperwork doctors had. It really shouldn't, but it always did.

As his hands dropped back down the doctor looked at the clock. He only had ten more minutes before he was off for the weekend and got to spend the entire time with Glen. Starting with a dinner at J.D.'s porch before going back to Glen's house.

The Janitor was going to be picking up some food before meeting him there. This was the kind of date that had the doctors smile widening. It wasn't big or extravagant, but it was just the two of them. It was always nice to know that the person he was dating actually liked spending time with him because he knew just how annoying he could be.

A loud beeping noise suddenly filled the small room causing J.D. to look down at his pager. Seeing the room number light up the screen his stomach dropped. He forgot the files he was working on as he ran to the room.

No, they had to have miswritten the numbers or something. He had just checked on this room and everything was fine. She was supposed to be being released tomorrow after spending one last night of being observed.

The lounge was only a little ways down the from the room so it didn't take long for him to get there. When he did Carla was running in behind him. Quickly barking out orders he let his mind focus sole on the patient.

This was his job. He had done this dozen of times before and almost every single patient he had brought back. He just needed to hear that small bleep on the monitor. That was all he needed.

Taking the paddles in his hands he waited for everyone to clear the body and pressed them to her chest. With each jolt of electricity through the body the doctor found himself becoming more and more desperate. He couldn't lose this patient.

A week ago a little girl around five years old, Riley Jenkins, had come into the hospital when she had an allergic reaction to cinnamon in some cookies. The reaction was so bad that she had been in a coma for a few days before waking up. J.D. had kept her an extra few days to make sure she was completely okay.

Because the young doctor was the man he was he ended up getting close to the girl. She was smart and one of the sweetest people he had ever met. She had even given him her Jell-O when she found out he had missed lunch that day.

There was no reason for her heart to give out on her even with how bad the reaction had been. Something else must have happened because she and her parents understood how horrible the results could be if she ever had cinnamon again. It made no sense.

J.D. watched as her body jerked one last time before he shakily put the paddles in their place. If he couldn't bring her back now then there was no chance of him ever bringing her back. How he wished he was like Dr. Cox and could start throwing punches without anyone questioning it.

"J.D.," Carla started after the doctor finally stuttered out time of death.

Shaking his head the younger man walked back into the lounge without saying anything. He was completely numb at the moment. It didn't even register what he was doing as he packed his files and clocked out. The trip to his scooter and then his apartment was blank as well.

Slamming the door shut behind him J.D. dropped his backpack on the floor collapsing onto the couch. It wasn't often that his mind was empty, but that's what it was now. Leaning forward the doctor buried his face in his hands taking in shallow shaky breaths.

He knew that some of his patients would die. A handful of them had done so in the past and more would come, but knowing that didn't make any of this better. In fact it made him question why he had ever thought becoming a doctor was a good idea.

The man had no idea how long he had been sitting, but he found himself jumping when a hand rested on his back. Turning around J.D. found himself staring up at his lover a bag of what was probably cold food resting on the counter behind him. He attempted a smile at the man, but he knew that it looked as horrible as he felt.

Glen continued to stare at the younger man feeling more than a little lost. It was obvious that the doctor needed to be comforted, but the Janitor had never really been one to comfort others. Out of everything this relationship had thrown at him this was, by far, the scariest and most confusing.

But he cared about this man. It was too soon for him to say he loved him, but if they kept going the way they were there was no doubt he'd end up there. One day. He just hoped J.D. would stick around long enough to see that day.

Moving slowly around the couch he sat next to the younger man never moving the hand from his back. They sat in silence J.D. trying to get a hold of himself while Glen tried to figure out what to say.

"Please don't," J.D. whispered when Glen finally opened his mouth, "I really don't want to talk."

"What do you want?" Glen questioned his voice just as low.

"Just…Don't leave?"

Glen nodded his head in agreement. As soon as J.D. saw this some of the tension in his shoulders relaxed, but he was still wound up tightly. They sat there for a few silent moments barely moving before the Janitor sighed heavily.

The older man found himself glad he was stronger than his lover as he pulled the doctor until they were both laying on the couch. Both were still fully clothed, but that didn't matter as J.D. turned to face the older man.

Blue eyes stared into brown for a moment before he moved up and brushed their lips together. It was like the doctor was trying to reassure himself that the older man was there. As he pulled back the last of the tension fell away from him.

"Thank you," J.D. spoke sleepily his eyes slipping shut as he fell asleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

It wasn't often that Glen and J.D. had the same day off, but they made the best of it when they did. It was a little before lunch time at the moment and J.D. had convinced his boyfriend to watch the first and only season of one of his favorite shows. Surprisingly enough the show wasn't half bad.

The TV wasn't what the Janitor was paying attention to though. While Glen was sitting in his normal spot on the couch J.D. was curled up and cuddled into the older man's side. It was peaceful and one of his favorite things to do now. Simply getting lost in the younger man was amazing.

After eight months of dating it still amazed the brown eyed man that this was his life now. A beautiful lover that knew him well enough for him to be comfortable being himself. He never felt like he had to hide and he hoped that J.D. felt the same way about everything that he did.

"Glen," J.D. sighed resting his head on the older mans chest, "Are we…Is this…When will I be able to tell people about you? About us?"

The Janitor looked down at the younger man, but found that the blue eyes were fixed on the television. Though they had been dating for almost a year they hadn't told anyone. Not even J.D.'s best friend Turk. Which was probably killing the brunette, but he had promised he wouldn't tell anyone until Glen was ready and that was a promise he was going to keep.

When the two entered their relationship neither of them knew what to expect. To J.D. the Janitor had always been there to hurt and degrade him. To Glen the doctor had been an easy target. They had to take it slow so they didn't ruin their relationship before it started.

There were points where Glen wondered if taking a year to tell people was wrong, but then he remembered how much the people that J.D. called friends disliked him. When it came down to it he knew that it wouldn't take all that much to convince him that all of this was completely ridiculous and for him to leave.

Still, it had been almost a year. If they kept down this road it was going to end anyway. It was as if the older man was stuck between a rock and a hard place. In his mind he was going to lose the doctor no matter what he did and that hurt him more than he thought it ever would.

Then there was J.D. and even if he hadn't said it yet he was in love with Glen. He was even almost completely positive that the older man loved him in return. He didn't know why it was so much harder for the brown eyed man to admit it, but he wasn't going to push.

They both knew that this was the best relationship either man had ever been in. It was something that they had dreamt of having, but never thought they'd get. They couldn't keep hiding, but the idea of telling was just as terrifying. The doctor was beginning to fear that this whole thing was going to end soon.

Neither man was really used to fear holding them back this much in their life, but it wasn't as if there was no reason. In fact, the Janitor knew of only one reason they should be together. They wanted it to be that way. Everything else that had ever happened between them said that this would end with one, if not both, of them brokenhearted.

Not that Glen was ever going to point that out to J.D. No, somehow over the months the taller man found himself falling for the kind-hearted doctor. How could he not? Though he guessed the better questions was how could he have spent so long trying to destroy him? That was long gone though. Okay, so he still did some thing to tease the man, but it held none of the malice that it had before. He truly was just teasing and J.D. knew that.

"Scooter," the Janitor sighed turning the TV off, "You know that's not a good idea."

"Why not?" J.D. asked softly, "I mean, are you…Are you having second thoughts?"

"No, I'm not. I just like what we have now. I like that it's just the two of us."

"So, we're never going to tell them?"

Hearing the sadness in the doctors voice Glen place a hand on his cheek and turned his head to face him. Those blue eyes held the same sadness in them that had Glen's heart clenching in his chest. He never meant to hurt J.D. with this. No, for once he was trying to protect him. Protect both of the.

A sudden shot of fear had the Janitor leaning down to cover the doctors lips with his own. He didn't want this to be the end, but the longer they hid the more likely that would be. So Glen kissed J.D. like it was the last time. Pouring every unspoken emotion into the kiss until the younger man pulled back panting harshly into the Janitor's chest.

"Maybe," J.D. started, "We can wait. Just a little while?"

Glen smiled slightly at that and moved so he was splayed over the doctor. A soft laugh came from J.D. as he wrapped his arms around the Janitors shoulders and pulled him into another kiss. Lips moved together languidly. Neither man had anywhere they needed to be and they simply wanted to spend their time feeling the man they were coming to love.

Glen moved down pressing soft kisses to J.D.'s neck causing a soft sigh to fall from the doctors lips as his head tilted to the side. Nipping at the soft skin the Janitor found himself wanting to feel more of J.D. Pulling back he pulled his shirt over his head before doing the same to his younger lover. Once they were both shirtless Glen let his lips travel down J.D.'s neck to his chest.

J.D. placed his hands on the Janitor's chest until he pulled back enough for the younger man to climb out from underneath him. The taller man watched as J.D. tugged his pants off and moved back so he was leaning on the wall. Confusion filled Glen, but as he moved to stand up a shake of J.D.'s head stopped him.

A hand slowly traveled up J.D.'s torso stopping at the mans neck. He skimmed his fingers over his throat head tilting to the side as he imagined they were his lovers lips. Moaning softly his hand started towards his chest. He kept his movements light and teasing until a groan came from the couch. His eyes opened only to see the half naked man now had a hand in his pants.

Whimpering softly the doctor let his nails drag down his skin leaving red marks in their wake. J.D. allowed his eyes to slip shut once more as he took a nipple between his fingers and twisted. A loud moan came from J.D. at that. Though it was the noises from Glen that had his hips thrusting forward. Just knowing he was the one making the older man sound like that was enough to have him grow hard.

"Come here," Glen spoke his voice deep with arousal, "Straddle me."

J.D. moved slowly back to the couch his obvious arousal leading the way. Throwing a leg over his lovers lap he sat down a moan leaving his lips when he felt the Janitor pressed against him. The doctor waited for those strong hands to touch him, but Glen simply sat back and gave him a dark, sexy smirk.

"I'm in control here, okay?" Glen calmly stated, "You'll do exactly what I say. Got it?"

"Got it," J.D. breathed his hands itching to touch.

"Good. Put two fingers in your mouth and imagine they were my cock. Don't hold back. I want to hear you. All those moans and sighs as you think about working your lips around me. Tasting me. Come on, J.D. suck them. Suck me."

The young doctor felt a shutter run through his body at the Janitor's words. He always thought the mans voice was sexy, but hearing him like this, so controlling and sensual, he doubted he'd fight him on anything. Which is why he had two fingers pushing into his mouth. His tongue lavishing each digit as he thought about what else could be in his mouth.

It was no secret how much J.D. loved sucking Glen off. Getting the younger man on his knees was no problem. No, in fact there had been a lot of mornings where the Janitor woke up to his hips thrusting shallowly into the wet warmth of J.D.'s mouth as the younger man thrust into his hand. It was one of J.D.'s favorite things to do. Not that the Janitor would ever complain. He loved it just as much.

Unconsciously the doctor s hips started to grate against the Janitor moans slipping from him as he felt them work together. Still, Gen didn't lift a finger to help his young lover. He sat back feeling the lithe body squirm deliciously against his. The only sounds in the small apartment the wet slurps of J.D.'s sucking and his moan.

"Stop," Glen growled causing J.D. to freeze, "Take your fingers out of your mouth and trace down to your nipple. Left one. Yes, just like that. Roll it between your fingers. There you go. Tug on it. Harder. Know you like it rougher than that. Make them hard for me. All for me."

Doing exactly what his older lover said J.D. found himself arching back more, louder moans coming from his throat. He loved having his nipples played with. It never failed to get him practically begging to be fucked. He was so close now. Knowing there was only a few layers between them had him shaking. He needed Glen. Needed to feel him.

Without thinking the doctor's hips ground down. Hard. Duel groans fell from the men, but the Janitor's turned into a growl as he gripped J.D.'s hips hard enough to bruise ceasing all movements. A whimper came from J.D. his fingers twisting harder. He needed some sort of relief from the pained pleasure that was coursing through his system.

"You're going to need lube for the next part," Glen ordered, "Bedroom. Now."

J.D. scrambled off of the Janitor to get into the bedroom. He had a good idea where this was going and he needed it. He needed to feel it. Needed that release. Moving quickly he got the lube out and splayed himself on his lovers bed. Panting heavily the doctor waited for Glen to walk in. He didn't have to wait long until the taller man strolled into the room hands tucked into the pockets of his pants.

From where he lay the younger man could see that the jeans had been undone.. Closing his eyes J.D. waited for Glen to join him on the bed, but after a few moments of silence he knew that wasn't going to happen.

"Glen," J.D. whined spreading his legs in invitation.

"Shh," Glen leaned on the doorframe, "Need you to stretch yourself open for me. Don't want to hurt you when I fuck you into that mattress. Hands and knees. Let me see you work yourself open for me."

Moving to do what the Janitor said J.D. settled on his knees and popped open the lube before coating two fingers. Because of work they hadn't been able to be together in a few days so J.D. knew he was tight. That didn't stop him from pushing both fingers inside himself. A pained whimper fell from his lip his head dropping to the bed. The idea of having Glen inside him though had him pumping his fingers.

His thrusts were shallow at first, trying to work past the self-inflected pain, but he had done this so may times in his life it wasn't long before he had three lubed fingers inside him and was thrusting back to met them. Sweat was building on his body with each thrust. Small gasps fell from his lips every time his fingers brushed his prostate. It was all too much yet not enough.

With a whimper J.D. fell onto his stomach his lower half rutting into the bed. With each circle of his hips the doctor said Glen's name until it was nothing more than a plea. One that was answered when the bed suddenly shifted and J.D. was pulled back onto his knees. The sound of the lube cap opening echoed through the bedroom and a well lubed penis was thrust into his waiting body a moment later.

The doctor was given no other warning before the Janitor pulled out and started a breakneck speed. A loud moan tore from the doctors throat. The movements were hard and sure. Glen didn't slow though he knew exactly what J.D. needed. He always had.

Moans and grunts were cut with squeaking mattress springs. J.D.'s nails dug into the bedspread below him trying to find some purchase as they moved together. It was harder than they had ever gone before, but it was so good.

The blue eyed mans voice grew louder and louder with each thrust until he was screaming his release. His body collapsed boneless on the bed as the Janitor continued to use his body for his own pleasure.

Closing his eyes J.D. focused on listening to his lover. Deep groans with each thrust. Hands holding his hips keeping him in place. It was one of the most beautiful experiences of his life.

The thrusts speed once more as the rhythm faltered. A soft moan came from J.D. when he felt Glen fill him. The older man kept inside him for a moment before he pulled out and rolled to the side so he wouldn't crush his lover.

Both men laid there panting, trying to get their hearts to calm. A shiver ran through J.D. as the sudden feeling of being alone though he was next to his lover crept in. Glen must have felt it too because he pulled J.D.'s body to his letting the younger man cuddle into him.

"Soon," Glen whispered carding a hand through J.D.'s sweat soaked locks, "We'll tell them soon. I promise."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

J.D. paced the length of his living room nervously as he waited for his friends to show up. In the background he could hear his boyfriend of nine months attempting to get him to sit down and relax, but that was the last thing he could do right now.

After all these months of hiding their relationship both men finally thought it was time to tell everyone. At first J.D. was beyond excited to finally be able to tell everyone how happy he was with Glen. Then his imagination decided to kick in.

Everything from Turk planning their wedding, he was going to have Journey no matter what anyone said. To Carla hooking them both up to a lie detector and asking every question she could think of, okay he had a sex dream about Turk, but that was only once. To Eliot performing a spell to send the Janitor into a void of complete nothingness, she does not look good in witch garb.

None of them, not even the ones where everything turned out alright, helped make him less nervous. His friends meant everything to him, but he cared about the Janitor. Okay, he loved him, but he was waiting for the right time to tell the older man. Those three words would change everything they had together.

Not that telling people wasn't going to do that. Was it too late to change his mind? Glen could hide in his room while he…Seriously, was he suddenly back in high school? He was an adult and nothing anyone said or did was going to make him leave the man he loved.

As J.D.'s mind started to go off on another tangent a knock came to his front door. The doctor felt as if his heart stopped when Turk's voice floated in from the other side. This was it. There was no going back.

The doctor took a shaky step towards the door only to have an arm wrap around his waist. A seasoned hand tilted his head back so the brown eyed man could press their lips together. The kiss was brief, just enough to reassure J.D. that he wasn't alone, and soon Glen was leaning against the opposite wall.

"Hey man," Turk grinned happily, "What was so…What is he doing here?"

The air in the apartment suddenly thickened with tension as Carla, Turk, and Eliot walked into the apartment. The Janitor itched to pull J.D. against him, to protect him from what was about to happen, but he waited. He'd move when the doctor actually needed his support. They were his friends.

Part of Glen was happy that he didn't have many friends. Truthfully, all he needed to do was tell his people the doctor was off-limits and that was the end. Maybe it was sad that he was alone for the most part, but at least he wasn't completely alone now.

"Well," J.D. started looking around at everyone, "He's here because we have some news for you."

"News?" Carla asked her hands on her hips, "What kind of 'news' could you and he have together? You guys hate each other."

"We don't hate each other. Just…Please, let me talk."

Carla leveled a glare at the Janitor, but nodded her head in consent. In the background Turk was staring at his best friend in confusion while Eliot looked like she wanted nothing more than to leave. She wasn't the only one. This was worse than anything he had imagined before.

"Okay," J.D. cleared his throat, "For the past nine months the Janitor and I…Well…We're dating."

The last two words came out as a squeak, but it still was loud enough to be heard. Everything seemed to stop for a moment before Carla started assuming how everything had started and if this was some major plan to do something horrible to her Bambi. Eliot was simply staring between the couple in a silent shock, but J.D.'s focus was on his best friend.

Turk stood at the doorway his eyes staring into J.D.'s. The doctor opened his mouth to explain everything but the surgeon simply shook his head before walking out of the apartment. Sending an apologetic look to his boyfriend J.D. took off after his best friend hoping he'd be able to talk him though whatever was in his head.

He was able to catch up to his friend a block away. Grabbing the mans arm he spun him around and looked into his eyes. He tried to figure out what he was thinking, but he couldn't. For once the two weren't on the same page.

"Nine months," Turk spoke shaking his head, "You've been dating the Janitor for nine months."

"I know I should have told you, but…" J.D. started.

"Damn right you should have told me! What happened to the guy being out of get you? Hurting you? Making your life hell?"

"He's not that…"

"What? Not that guy anymore? Guys like that don't just change. And what about not telling anyone? That his idea?"

"Yes, but…"

"But nothing! How can you think this is a good idea?"

"You don't know him."

"No one does! J.D., he's going to hurt you."

"He's not who you think he is, Turk. Get to know him. You'll see that."

"I don't want to get to know him. I want you safe!"

"I am safe! I've actually never felt safer and I'm happy. I am happy with him. Can't you see that? You and Carla and everyone else have been pointing out how happy I am these past months. He's the reason I'm happy. Please, can't you try? Try to see him the way I do? Or just deal with the fact that I'm happy? Be happy for me. Please."

Turk stared at J.D. before sighing and pulling the pale man into a hug. Feeling his best friends arms around him the doctor felt hope course through him. If he could get the surgeon on his side then everyone else would follow.

"J.D.," Turk sighed pulling away, "I can't be okay with this. Not with everything he's done to you."

"Turk?" J.D. questioned his eyes wide.

"You're still my best friend, J.D. You always will be. The Janitor is the worst guy for you to date. I'd rather you date Dr. Cox. I won't try to get to know him because I know that he's going to hurt you, but I won't walk away from you. Nothing will ever come between us. Come on, you're my Vanilla Bear. Look, I need think. I should go. We'll talk later."

J.D. watched as his best friend turned and walked away once more. He believed him when he said that they were still best friends, but it hurt knowing he didn't approve of his relationship with Glen. He knew that telling everyone wouldn't end well, but this was beyond anything.

Turning around J.D. slowly made the trek back to his apartment. Even from the hallway he could hear the raised voices. Closing his eyes the doctor tried to push the headache he was getting away as he got closer, but his head was pounding angrily with each step.

"J.D.," Glen spoke causing Carla and Eliot to whip around to look at him.

"Bambi," Carla sighed pulling him into a hug, "Are you okay?"

"I don't know yet. Please tell me you guys aren't going to make this hard too?"

"We just think that this is a bad idea."

"It's really not, Carla. It's a very simple situation. I like the Janitor and he likes me. We've been dating for nine months and I hope that we're going to be dating for a lot longer. What else is there to discuss?"

"What about everything you told us about him? How he hurt you?"

"Have I said anything negative about him lately? Look, I know it's hard to believe and that no one else ever seems to agree with me, but people do change."

"Not this quickly."

"It's been nine months. Yes, there are been some times when he is a little too mean or I accuse him of something that went wrong in my life, but that hasn't stopped us from trying. We're good together. You guys will see that."

Carla looked back at the Janitor as if trying to figure out if what J.D. was saying was true, but the older man gave nothing away. Truthfully, he was still a little afraid of the Latina, but he wasn't going to run away from her.

"This is a bad idea, J.D.," Eliot chimed in, "I mean, he's nice and all to me, but to you?"

"He's not evil or anything that I said. He was…Look, I don't know how to explain it."

"I think…"

"Eliot, I love you. I really do. But this is my relationship. Not your. Not Carla's. if this ends badly then you guys have free reign to tell me you were right for the rest of our lives, but it's my choice."

Carla and Eliot stared at J.D. in shock. He never talked to them, or anyone for that matter, like that. He wasn't really conflict oriented though it did seem to find him rather quickly wherever he went.

"Can we talk tomorrow guys?" J.D. asked looking pleadingly at his friends.

"J.D.," Carla started.

"I'm happy and I'm safe, okay? That's all that matters."

Carla and Eliot looked at each other before nodding their heads and leaving. As soon as the door was closed J.D. was pulled against Glen's chest. Spinning around in the strong arms the doctor buried his head in his lovers neck and took a shaky breath. He really didn't want to start crying now.

"It wouldn't have helped if we told them sooner," Glen sighed.

"I know," J.D. responded softly, "I just with they'd give you a chance. That they'd get to know you because you're a good person. You really are, Glen."

"Shh. It's okay."

"I just wish that…You know what? It's stupid. Can we just go to bed? I really don't want to think anymore."

The Janitor nodded his head letting go of the younger man. J.D. linked his hand his lovers and pulled the older man towards his room. The idea of spending the night with the man then waking up in his arms sounded like one of the few things that would help right now.

"It'll work out," Glen said kissing J.D.'s forehead once they were under the covers.

"With or without everyone getting hurt?" J.D. asked cuddling into the older man, "With or without?"


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this before, but I wasn't sure about it. I am now. It might take awhile to finish, but I will finish it. This is going to have a lot of ups and downs in it. Not always happy, but I like it. Lots of sex.
> 
> I own nothing. Please review. Enjoy!

"Glen?" J.D. called walking into the Janitor's house, "Are you here?"

J.D. slowly walked through the now well known house searching for his lover. The living and dining room were empty, but before he could walk into the kitchen a pair of strong arms wrapped around his waist pulling him back to the muscled chest of the Janitor. J.D. let out a hum of contentment as he let himself relax in the arms. Safety and happiness filled the younger man as the blue eyes slipped shut.

This was his favorite place. Warmth from his lover seeping into him as the man placed soft kisses to his neck. Never had J.D. thought the man would be so sweet, so loving, but here they were. Ten months into their relationship and the doctor was completely and utterly in love with the Janitor. Something everyone had tried to talk him out of. He'd agree that when his crush started he never thought he'd be in a relationship with the older man. Then he got to know Glen. Not the Janitor, but his loving, amazing boyfriend Glen Matthews.

Glen was the most amazing man J.D. had ever met, but he still held that dangerous energy that the Janitor had. That was something the younger man loved. He never wanted to lose that fire that he was known for. No, that fire had simply stopped being about hurting J.D. to loving him. And of was he loving. All of that fighting and the sneakiness turned into this passion that was beyond anything that J.D. had ever known. And something he truly never wanted to be without.

"Hello," Glen muttered against his skin.

"Hi," J.D. sighed.

"You're tense. Long day?"

"Besides everyone continuing their quest to convince me to break-up with you? Bus accident. We lost…"

Before J.D. could finish his sentence his head was tilted back and his lips covered by his lovers. Unlike the hand that was running up his side gently the kiss was demanding and drove all thoughts from the young doctors mind. That was something that J.D. loved. He was able to drive all the things that were torturing J.D. from his day at work.

Sighing into the kiss J.D. turned around and wrapped his arms around Glen's neck. As the kiss grew deeper J.D. found himself pushed against the wall the older mans tongue pushing past his lips coaxing his to join it. Their tongues brushed against each other sighs falling from both parties. Both simply content in basking in the others warmth.

Pressing his body tightly to his lovers J.D. trailed his hands down Glen's back moaning as he felt the muscles working under the mans shirt. J.D. wasn't a muscular man, he never had been and never would be, but feeling the mans muscles moving under his hands and feeling calloused fingers running over his in return had a shiver running down his spine. It was all made that much better knowing that he was feeling that because the taller man wanted to bring him pleasure.

Glen broke the kiss and stared down at J.D. As always the Janitor had this look of wonder in his eyes. Even with ten months under their belt it was like he had no idea why J.D. was still with him. Actually everyone that knew about their relationship had asked the young doctor that question more times than he could count. J.D. simply smiled each time. He knew he was the only one that believed the relationship would last, but he was going to make the most of it while he could. It wasn't that he wanted Glen to leave him the doctor just knew that if anyone did leave it would be the Janitor.

No, J.D. never wanted this to end. He was in love with the brown eyed man. The very man that tortured him day in and day out sine he started working at the hospital. The very man that had plagued the mans nightmares for so long. Now those dark, twisted nightmares were the most beautiful, colorful, periodically erotic, dreams that J.D. had and he never wanted that to end now that he had the real Glen in his life.

"I'm sorry about today," Glen said running a thumb across J.D.'s jaw.

"Me too," J.D. nodded, "But I don't want to talk, or think about it."

"Oh? What exactly do you want then, Dr. Dorian?"

Smirking at the Janitor J.D. ran his hands over the buttons slowly opening the dark blue shirt. When it was unbuttoned completely J.D. tugged it and his white undershirt out of his pants and slipped them off. Once the muscles were exposed to the doctor he linked a hand with the Janitor's and led him to the couch. Pushing the older man down J.D. sunk to his knees and smiled.

His hands moved to the chest before him and slowly ran his fingers over the skin. The doctor kept his movements teasing. Simply feeling the warm body under his hands. Loving that it was him that was causing the Janitor to pant and the soft sounds to leave him. It was amazing to have that kind of power over the man. Part of J.D. simply wanted to tie Glen down and never let him leave just so he could hear those delicious sounds. Something Glen had pointed out he wanted as well. Of course, then J.D. would be the one tied up.

Moving forward J.D. placed kisses to the chest using his tongue to draw random designs periodically. Sighs and soft groans came from Glen with each swipe of J.D.'s tongue. It was simple for the couple. Innocent. In all the time that they'd been together that was not something that had ever described their sex before. Not that they weren't loving or caring, but they weren't innocent. They both loved how passionate the other was.

J.D. took a nipple into his mouth and gently worried it with his teeth while his hands pinched and twisted the other. The Janitor didn't have the same thing for nipples that the doctor did, but he did love all of the younger mans focus on him. Glen leant his head against the back of the couch and let his eyes slip shut. Getting lost in his own little J.D. world. That was something that he loved. It was blissful feeling of everything the young doctor was willing to give him.

The doctor lapped and nipped at every inch of skin presented to him. Tonight he needed everything to be slow, he needed to feel everything that the Janitor was giving as well as what he was giving to the Janitor. That's all that tonight was going to be about. J.D. remembering what pleasure could come from feeling. Especially after so much feeling at work nearly drove him to tears.

The Janitor seemed to be on the same page because he laid there as J.D. worked. He might not have the same job as the younger man, but he had seen too may people fall apart because of the job. If J.D. needed to feel every inch of the man then so be it. It wasn't as if he wasn't going to get anything out of it either. No, soon he'd feel the most amazing warmth encompass him when J.D. finally sunk down on him. Until then he'd let J.D. do as he please.

When J.D. finished with the chest he unbuckled the belt slowly before stopping all together. His hands shakily started to reach for Glen's pants button, but they were shaking too badly. Everything from the days work hitting him all at once. The doctor did everything he could to hold it back, but a sob fell from his lips because he could stop it.

Instantly the Janitor's eyes were open and he was tilting his young lovers face to him. J.D. hated to hide his feelings. He loved when people said he was an open book. At times like this more than ever. He didn't want to talk. Actually he didn't want to do anything but touch his lover, but as he let out a shaky breath he knew that was out of the window. At least he thought he knew. J.D. could barely believe it as Glen placed his hands more firmly on his pants and helped pull them off. As usual he was wearing nothing underneath.

"Tell me what you need," Glen whispered when he was completely naked.

"You," J.D. replied his voice just as soft.

"I got that already. I meant how. How do you want me?"

"I want…I need to feel you. I need to make sure you're alive."

The Janitor stared at the doctor for a moment before placing both hands on the mans hips and lifting. Once the young man was placed in his lovers lap he was pulled into a deep kiss. Tongues danced together moving in a way no one else could ever know with them. They both wanted the man they were with to be their last.

Not wanting to be the only one naked Glen took off the scrubs top and undershirt J.D. was wearing. A moan came from the younger man as knowing fingers took a nipple between them and rolled and pinched until the nubs were hard. When they were the Janitor bent down and took one in his mouth. J.D. sighed his head falling back while his chest pressed closer to the mans lips. Glen looked up at his young lover, but could only see the mans Adam's apple bobbing up and down as J.D. swallowed harshly.

Pulling back from the lithe body caused a disappointed moan to come from J.D. They both knew just how much J.D. loved having his nipples sucked. The Janitor had vowed to try to bring the young doctor off by just playing with them, but today was not the day for that. No, this was about J.D. He really needed to remember this was for J.D.

Smirking slightly the taller man slowly pushed the scrubs bottom and boxer briefs off the slim hips. J.D. let the other man completely strip him and got comfortable on the mans lap when he was completely naked. A sigh came from both men when they felt their skin touch. So peaceful and warm. It was as if this was where they were meant to be.

As lips met once more hands traveled over naked skin. The movements were soft, but sure. Both men knew what the other liked. Nails skimmed over skin hard enough to leave a red line, but nothing more. They had never gotten violent with each other, at least not in this situation. Though J.D. had a feeling the other man would want to explore that side at some point in time. Something he was fine with as long as he could bring his own kinks as well.

J.D. trailed his hands down the Janitor's chest nails catching slightly on the mans navel. His eyes darkened when he felt the dark hairs that led him to his prize. He made sure to keep his grip lose when he finally wrapped his hand around the mans penis. Everything had been so soft and sweet and open, this side of innocent so he wasn't hard yet, but the hand stroked him into full hardness with a couple of sure tugs. J.D. might be awkward and clumsy in his everyday life, but when it came to sex he knew exactly what he was doing.

Which was why he used his free hand to pull a tube of lube that he knew Glen had between the cushions now. He easily slicked his fingers and pushed one inside of him. A moan came from the man at the feeling. The couple had done this before J.D. left for work, but that had been almost two days ago.

In the back of his mind he knew that he had to go back to work the next day, but J.D. simply pushed another finger in and stretched himself quickly. He didn't want it to hurt, but he wanted to be able to remember this every time he moved. He needed to know that he had someone to go home to. A little happiness for himself. He pushed in a third.

Removing his fingers J.D. moved so he was over Glen's penis. The Janitor looked like he was going to protest knowing that J.D. wasn't fully stretched. Before a sound could slip from his lips the doctor slowly sat down. A bliss filled groan cam from Glen as J.D. whimpered. He felt so filled in that moment and for a second he thought he should have stretched himself more. Then he was fully seated.

"Oh," J.D. sighed his eyes drifting shut, "Have I ever told you how much I love you being in me?"

"A few times," Glen smirked resting his hands on the mans hips, "I don't think I'll ever tire hearing it."

"Good."

Leaning forward J.D. pressed his lips to his lovers his tongue pushing its way into the willing mouth. His hands were placed over Glen's a moment before he lifted up and dropped back down. The motion wasn't much, but it had both men moaning. A hand moved from J.D.'s hip to his hair and tilted his head to a better angle.

Both men kept their movements slowly simply letting each other feel. Soft sighs came from both men as they moved. It was perfect in J.D.'s mind. So loving and amazing. Glen taking care of him in a way no one had been able to before. He was doing all of this for the doctor. Every last thrust and flick of the tongue was for his pleasure. That thought caused J.D. to move faster.

The progression was slow, but soon the younger man was lifting almost all the way off the Janitor's penis and dropping back down as quickly as he could. Glen's hips thrust to met J.D.'s, but when the younger man squeezed around him all thoughts went out the window.

Wrapping an arm under J.D. the Janitor stood up. Once the doctors legs were secure around his waist Glen started to make his way to his bedroom only to stop short when the doctors nails dug into his back. Growling softly the older man pushed J.D. against the wall and thrust into him. Using all his strength he set a breakneck pace that had the doctor panting harshly against his chest small screams coming from his lips every few thrusts.

"You're beautiful," Glen muttered staring at the sweat slicked body before him, "Why? Why are you still here? With me?"

"Be-cause," J.D. moaned his eyes locking with Glen's, "I…I lo-love you."

Glen stopped moving all together at the confession. Some part of him knew that this was where their relationship was heading, but to hear the words said aloud still surprised him. Never would he have thought that the man would ever…Could ever love him. Pressing a kiss to the full lips Glen wrapped a hand around J.D. and started to move once more.

It didn't take much for J.D.'s orgasm to come. A scream came from him as he tightened around Glen causing him to spill into the willing body. As they both came down from their high Glen found himself staring at J.D. He had no idea what he was supposed to do or say now.

"J.D." Glen sighed.

"Don't," the doctor smiled sadly, "I know you don't feel the same way."

"I might. One day."

"Tell me then. Just…Hold me now? Please?"


	11. Chapter 11

"We need to talk," Carla demanded walking up to the Janitor and his people, "Alone. Now."

Everything was silent for a moment before Glen nodded his head in consent causing the others to leave. It had officially been one month since his and J.D.'s relationship came to light and things were going exactly like the older man thought. Which to say was not a good thing.

The day after they told J.D.'s best friends it was all over the hospital. At first everyone thought it was a joke, but after a week of both men saying it was real the comments and looks started causing the men to be on edge around the people they worked with

No one minded that they were both men, they were a little surprised to know Glen was gay, but that was it. No, the problem was the fact it was  _J.D. and the Janitor_. Glen swore if he was accused of brain washing or abusing the doctor he was going to kill someone. It might be difficult to understand how they got together after everything, but this was starting to get ridiculous.

All in all though, the three people that J.D. truly cared about were the ones not even attempting to understand. Yes, everyone else was making comments, but that was slowly coming to an end. Then the three would say something once more and everything would start all over again.

The Janitor might dislike the accusations everyone was making, but it was nothing to him at the end of the day. The only thing he was concerned about was how J.D. was taking everything. While that was better than he expected the brown eyed man could see how each comment weighed his lover down.

There was nothing he could do to help the younger man. Though the thought of them just breaking up all together had come to mind more than once. Anything to get that sadness out of his eyes. Glen knew that that would just make things worse. He just wanted J.D. to be happy again.

"What can I do for you, Nurse Espinoza?" Glen asked leaning back in his chair.

"Oh, cut the bull," Carla glared, "What are you playing at?"

"What makes you think I'm playing at anything?"

"You're dating J.D."

"I wasn't aware he was un-dateable."

"You know what I mean!"

Feeling the anger that had been slowly filling him ever since the whole situation started suddenly boil to the surface the Janitor straightened in his chair and glared back. Glen could admit to having a small fear of the Latina, but now was not the right time for that fear to show itself. This was about J.D. and he wasn't going to let the younger man down.

Glen wanted to prove to not only J.D. and himself that he could take care of him, but everyone else as well. He knew what he came off as and he knew how much the blue eyed man used to fear him. Somehow that fear had turned into love and he wasn't going to let him down.

He still couldn't believe J.D. loved him. It had been almost a year that they started this whole thing and it wasn't like they both didn't know that they'd end up there one day, but to hear those words fall from those full lips was the best feeling he'd ever had. It was the perfect moment, or it would have been if he had said it back.

It wasn't as if he didn't feel it too, he had felt that for awhile now, but he didn't really do love. He hadn't said it aloud since he was a child and even then he didn't ever really hear it back. Now J.D. was the one to say it and he had found himself completely unable to utter those three words back no matter how much he wanted to.

What was it about the doctor that changed everything? In all his year of observing people in the hospital he'd never seen Dr. Cox or Carla got like they do towards him. They had let the younger man into their hearts whether they meant to or not and no matter how much they fought it and there was no way that he was ever going to leave.

As much as Glen hated to admit it J.D. was able to break past any wall that was put in front of him, if he wanted to. There were times when he'd leave the walls in place, but he always made sure the person knew he was there for them. It was something that made him a wonderful doctor and a hell of a person.

"I know this is just some game to you," Carla's voice broke through his thoughts, "And if you think for one second that…"

"What made it seem like a game?" Glen interrupted with a faux-curious tone.

"What?"

"Tell me what part of our relationship made it seem like this was a game?"

"Well, you…"

"Take him on dates? Spend the night and our off days with him? Have clothing at his house?"

"You're just…"

"Playing him? Yes, this is my big plan. That's why he told you."

"You told him to wait! For months!"

"What did you think I would do?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"This is what I was trying to avoid. Have you even seen J.D. lately? He's miserable."

"He wouldn't be miserable if you guys weren't dating."

"Really? That's what you're going with? Why don't you compare how J.D. was before and after he told you about our relationship and then try to tell me off."

Carla broke eye contact with the older man for a moment. She was beginning to question what she thought before. Still, it was the Janitor. Could everyone have possibly been this wrong about the man? Was he really this good of an actor?

The nurse just wanted her friend to be safe. That was it. Yes, she didn't know the Janitor even after years of working in the same place, but she had heard everything that her young friend had said. Even if she hadn't actually believed a word of it until they announced their relationship.

"If you hurt him…" Carla started trying to keep the upper hand.

"Let's straighten one thing out," Glen stood up, "I'm not the one hurting him."

Carla completely froze at that. Was it possible that she…that they were the ones that were hurting J.D.? No, they were just trying to protect him. He was so innocent and naïve. He needed to be protected from people like the Janitor.

What was even up with that? Did J.D. know the mans real name? Because she had only ever heard him call the other man by his title. Who did that? It just didn't make any sense to the Latina.

Looking away from the older man the nurse thought back to everything that had been happening lately. The Janitor was right when he said that J.D. had been happy. Happier than she had ever seen him. Even with all the relationships he'd been in and there was the fact that this was the longest one.

No matter what he said the doctor always ruined his relationships. He liked being with someone, but the second it started to get even remotely serious something enviably happened to destroy it and in the end it was almost always stupid and J.D.'s fault. It was just how things went with him.

Almost a year though. That was practically unheard of. It was…It was actually something she would be proud of if it wasn't for the fact that he was dating a guy he repeatedly said had harmed and threatened him. It was just begging to turn into an abusive relationship.

"Have you talked to J.D. lately?" the Janitor questioned crossing his arms over his chest.

"Of course I have," Carla rolled her eyes.

"Really? Because from what I've heard you've been lecturing him instead of actually listening to him. If you did you'd see why everything you're assuming is wrong. You never were good at listening though, were you?"

"Hey, you don't…"

"I do, Carla, I do get to say things like this because someone has to and J.D. is too good of a person to."

"Are you…You're trying protect him? From us?"

"If I need to."

The nurse wanted nothing more than to scoff once again at the Janitor, but something told her that she couldn't do that anymore. The more she thought about it the more it seemed like the man was right about everything. They were hurting J.D. by acting the way they were.

Still, at the end of the day she found herself at least somewhat glad that things happened this way. She knew the Janitor was afraid of her and seeing him stand up to her to protect J.D. was a good thing. It was something that the younger man was going to need.

"One year?" Carla questioned nodding her head.

"Yeah," the Janitor answered, "One year next month."

"Have you thought about what you're going to do for him?"

"What I'm going to do for him? I'm going to ask him to move in."

"Really? How are you going to do that?"

"Over dinner?"

"Yeah, but how? You do know that J.D. likes big romantic gestures? That if you want this relationship to keep going strong you need to do something big every once in awhile?"

"I do?"

"Come on, Janitor, I'll figure out exactly what you're going to do. All you need to do is follow what I say exactly."


	12. Chapter 12

"Scooter," the Janitor nodded at his young lover as he passed him in the hospital hallway.

J.D. looked up from his patients chart hopeful, but the Janitor simply walked past him. Today was the couples one year anniversary and there was a lot riding on it. At least that's what everyone who was in on the bet was saying. Last he heard the pot was almost two thousand dollars. It really was hurtful that no one believed that they would last.

In the three months that people had known about their relationship everything seemed to have changed. Turk was barely talking to him and if he did it was trying to convince him to end everything. Eliot was spouting off random stories from her past or just rambling about nothing. Carla was lecturing him about everything without actually telling him anything.

The only thing that hadn't changed was Dr. Cox making fun of him for things. It was no meaner or hurtful than before. It was like he didn't care. It was a breath of fresh air compared to everything else. Honestly that was the only thing keeping him sane. Well that and seeing Glen as often as he could.

Luckily enough for the doctor the Janitor didn't seem to mind that he was a little clingier than usual. He took everything that was thrown at him in stride. He still didn't smile very often, but he liked that J.D. curled around him as soon as he could and he even listened when he went off on tangents about absolutely nothing. It was amazing.

And no one was able to see the side of Glen and more often than not that brought pleasure to him. J.D. wasn't a possessive person. That didn't stop the excitement of knowing just how loving and caring and all together beautiful his Janitor was. That was for him and him alone. Which was fine. For the most part.

Still, J.D. was a romantic at heart. He loved big displays of affection and he knew that he wasn't going to get that with the Janitor. Hell, the older man didn't even like to hold hands in public. The younger man could deal with that though because, no matter what anyone else believed, J.D. loved Glen. And if Glen hadn't said it back to him that was no ones business either.

Yet everyone continued to think that they knew better. That this relationships was going to end just like all of his other ones or that it was just fake on one or both of their parts. All of it was almost enough to make him pull his hair out. How many times did he have to say that this was going to last before people started to believe him?

It was times like this though J.D. wished for just a little acknowledgement. He already had had to stay at his place alone last night. He wasn't looking for anything big honestly, though that is what he wanted, but him simply saying the words would be enough. That wasn't too much to ask for, was it? Yeah, Dr. Cox was right. He was a girl.

"Bambi," Carla smiled happily walking up to J.D., "What are you still doing here?"

"My shift doesn't end until midnight," J.D. responded in confusion, "Wait, are you… Are we actually having a conversation?"

"Of course we are. Why are you acting so shocked?"

"Carla, we haven't had a conversation that didn't involve you telling me how stupid I was being for dating the Janitor since you found out I was dating the Janitor."

"Well, can you blame me?"

"I'm not sure yet, but I can be upset that you don't trust me."

"Look, this hasn't exactly been easy on anyone. Everyone is worried about you."

"Worried about me? I know it's hard to believe, but the Janitor isn't abusing me in anyway. He's not the man you think he is."

"Alright, J.D., I trust you, but if he hurts you even once I'm kicking that guys ass."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

Moving quickly J.D. pulled the small woman into a hug. He had really missed having not only her, but all his friends around. He missed spending time with people and being able to talk about the person he was dating. He was a social person and hopefully Carla talking to him meant that he was finally getting that part of his life back.

"Can we have lunch soon?" J.D. questioned softly, "Or get drinks? I really miss you."

"Of course," Carla smiled, "But for now you need to go."

"Go? Carla, I told you. My shift is over at midnight."

"Not today. Go home."

J.D. opened his mouth to argue, but the nurse leveled one of her glares at him. With a sigh and shrug of his shoulders the young doctor went to do what his friend said. By now he knew better than to argue with her even if that was all he wanted to do.

Before long the doctor found himself at his apartment looking forward to forgetting everything about this day. If that was what Glen was going to do then that worked for him as well.

That didn't make any sense though. The Janitor had never shown any indication that he wanted to end their relationship. Maybe he really did just forget that it was their anniversary. It wouldn't be the first time something like that happened. J.D. just never realized how much it hurt.

Sighing the blue eyed man kicked off his shoes and moved towards the bathroom. If today wasn't a  _Les Mis_ type of day he wasn't sure what was. Which sounded like the perfect plan. Good music and a nice bubble bath sounded like just the thing.

Flipping the lights on J.D. opened took out his MP3 player and set everything up. As the music started he stripped out of his scrubs while dancing around and opened the shower curtain.

The doctor stopped all of his movements when he realized that most of his things were missing or had been replaced all together. No one he knew was stupid enough to touch his personal care products.

It was no secret that J.D. had a lot of things for his hair and body. It annoyed everyone he came into contact with and everyone had heard about his routine and products more than once. So seeing his things gone was not a very good surprise to say the lest. At least it wasn't until he picked up one of the bottles.

An incredulous laugh left his lips when he say the brand name on the bottle. He would never be able to afford it with all of his school bills. Thinking about it he didn't know anyone that would buy something like this for him.

Suddenly extremely eager the doctor opened the cap and let out a low moan of appreciation when the smell hit his nose. It was one had hadn't smelt before and he could only say it was that of a midnight stroll through a forest. Grinning J.D. turned the water on and climbed in when it was hot enough.

As the almost scalding liquid washed over J.D. he let his mind go completely blank. Right now was simply about enjoying the feelings and smells all around him. Not wondering why his boyfriend of one year refused to acknowledge him. No, focus on the good, expel all the bad. At least for the next hour or so.

Feeling extra indulgent J.D. worked the shampoo then conditioner through his hair slowly. He let his nails rake over his scalp soft moans of bliss falling from hips lips as he did so. He might do this every day, but it never lost its appeal.

After finishing with his hair he poured the body wash into a small clothe and started to wash the day off of him. His eyes slipped shut as he worked. The smell mixed with the small massage he was giving himself was relaxing. It would only be better if Glen was…No, he wasn't going to go down that road.

The shower took a little over an hour since J.D. wanted nothing more than to stay there and continue his relaxation, but he really did hate getting prune-y. Getting out of the shower the doctor grabbed a towel out of closet and patted himself down. Once he was dry he wrapped the towel around his waist and started in on his hair and skin.

It was nice to see that everything was the same brand and smell. That really was one of the things that he hated the most. He wanted to smell like one thing at a time. Not twenty-five thousand.

Keeping the slow pace the rest of his routine took another 30 minutes. The routine itself was something of an indulgence and with these products he was going to take that to a new level.

Turning off the music J.D. put the lotion done before walking into his bedroom thinking of the perfect outfit for tonight while hoping he could call Carla and get her to come out with him. There was no way he could look and smell this good and not have someone show him some appreciation for it. If Glen wasn't here than that was just his loss.

Of course J.D. would never cheat on his boyfriend, but dancing wasn't cheating, was it? Humming happily the young man opened his underwear drawer only to freeze. Normally there were nine or ten pairs in the drawer, but now there was only one and it wasn't even a pair that he had even seen before.

Swallowing back his confusion J.D. pulled out the light blue boxer briefs. He could tell that they had been taken out of their packaging and placed in the drawer with care. It was almost like someone was presenting them to the doctor.

With a shaky breath J.D. dropped the towel and ran a hand over the soft fabric. He had no idea what was going on, but right now he could care less. They were so soft and as he slipped them on he felt his eyes slip shut in pleasure.

It was so odd to be wearing something like that, but there was no doubt in his mind that he felt good. A wide grin came to his face when he thought about what other changes had happened while he had been at work.

Throwing the door of his closet open the grin widened at the sight of a singular suit. It was black in color with a light blue shirt and black tie with light blue strips. Bouncing on his heels the young man reached out to take the trousers in his hands. It, along with the jacket, were pure wool and just as expensive as everything else.

His movements once again slowed as he pulled the suit on. Everything just felt so exquisite against his body. Never before had he though he had a clothing kind, but as he pulled the shirt on he found himself getting hard.

Running a hand down his body J.D. moaned in happiness. He wanted nothing more than to climb into bed and bring himself off. He never thought he had a clothes kink, but the suit was just so perfect. He wanted to savor every moment. It took him almost three times as long to get dressed because he wanted to savor every moment of it.

Once the suit was on J.D. went to his dresser again and opened his sock drawer. One pair of black socks greeted him. The smile never left his lips as he pulled them on before getting the shoes that he knew would be there. Once fully dressed he looked in the mirror and smirked. He did look practically edible right now.

As the doctor was checking himself out his phone went off. Thinking it was the hospital he sighed and started to think of the next time he could wear the suit. He was surprised though to find the message was from an unknown caller. The txt simply said 'Outside'. Confusion filled J.D., but he grabbed his phone, wallet, and keys and went outside.

Opening the door to his apartment building J.D. made his way outside looking for whomever messaged him. In the back of his mind he knew that he should probably be wary, but he wouldn't be himself if he didn't believe the best in every situation.

A confused, but happy smile came to the doctors lips when he came face to face with his boyfriend leaning against a black BMW with a white orchid in his fingers. A small smile came to Glen's face when J.D. walked out. It wasn't big enough for most people to see, but the doctor could tell.

The Janitor was wearing a light gray suit with a dark blue shirt underneath. He had forgone a tie, but still looked perfectly put together. This was the first time J.D. had seen the man like this and he was happy to admit that the older man cleaned up very nicely.

"Glen," J.D. breathed out.

"Delicate beauty," Glen responded hoping up the flower, "I figured it fit with you."

Smiling softly J.D. took the orchid from his lovers fingers. It was perfect. The whole date was absolutely perfect and it hadn't even started yet. Leaning up the doctor kissed the Janitor's lips gently before moving to bury his head in his shoulder.

Arms wrapped around the doctors waist keeping him against the brown eyed man. The smile that had been on his lips since he got home softened as he took a deep breath loving the scent that his boyfriend had one. The only way he could describe it was waves hitting the shoreline. It smelled wonderful.

After a moment of just standing there Glen pulled back and led J.D. to the BMW. Opening the passengers side door the Janitor helped him in before climbing in on the drivers' side. He started up the car and pulled out of the parking lot without saying a word.

The older man could admit that he was a little distracted by his lover. When he took his lovers measurements in his sleep last week he never imagined the suit looking that good. Part of him wanted to forget the whole plan and screwed J.D. in the car.

With a slight shake of his head to get back on course the Janitor silently drove to the restaurant. It had taken a lot to get reservations and it was something he was sure J.D. would like. The drive didn't take that long and soon he was helping the younger man out of the car and into the restaurant.

The couple was lead to their table and left alone with the menus. Still neither man spoke. J.D. was too caught up in everything that was going on around him and Glen was waiting for the doctor. He knew that it was a lot to take in, but he could show some patience and wait for his young lover.

"Hello, my name is Kate and I'll be your waitress," a petite red head smiled walking to their table, "What can I start you off with?"

"I'll have a Blackberry wine," J.D. started when Glen didn't, "And the Firecracker Shrimp as an appetizer."

"Okay, and you sir?"

"Jack Daniels," Glen supplied calmly.

"Alright, I'll be right out with those and to get your dinner order."

When Kate left silence enveloped the couple once more. It wasn't awkward by any means, but it was still silence. Glen watched the people around them while J.D. attempted to get his thoughts in order. He had a million questions to ask and they all were racing in his mind until he finally looked at his boyfriend and opened his mouth.

"How did you get the BMW?" J.D. blurted out.

"Scary Nurse," Glen answered with a smirk and a shrug.

"Scary Nurse? Oh Carla?"

"Yes. Her."

"Okay, I'm sorry, but I have to know. How is she 'Scary Nurse'? And yes, I do want the full story."

The Janitor proceeded to tell the doctor of all the instances of him and Carla bumping heads. J.D. was enthralled by the story and as hard as he tried he couldn't stop the soft laughs that spilled from his lips. Luckily, Glen didn't seem to mind and continued on until Kate came back with the appetizer and drinks.

"Have you decided your orders?" Kate questioned pulling out her pad.

"I'll have the pan seared shellfish fettuccine," J.D. smiled happily handing Kate the menus.

"Grilled smoked sirloin and jumbo prawns," Glen said nodding in thanks.

Kate took the menus and left with a nod of her head. J.D. and Glen stared at each other until the doctor felt himself dissolver in laugher. He would never be able to get a two inch tall Janitor cowering in fear as a witch Carla hackled above him and a Turk black cat swiped his paw at the newly cursed man.

"You'd fit in my pocket," J.D. giggled coming out of his imagination.

Glen counted himself lucky that he knew about the doctor imagination or this would be one of the weirdest things he'd ever seen. He did like how odd the doctor was though. He wasn't exactly normal himself and this way he knew his oddness would be accepted. It also didn't hurt that the man was one of the most amazing people he'd ever met.

It was true that when the Janitor first met J.D. he had thought him a child and now… Well, he still thought of him as a child, but there was so much more to him. He was also kind, smart, generous, and more. Why the doctor was willingly with Glen was beyond him, but he wasn't going to complain.

The rest of dinner was filled with both men laughing as they told stories from their past. It was an odd thing, but Glen actually felt like he could talk to J.D. He had never felt that way before. Honestly he had no idea what his young lover was doing to him, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

Before long their dinner was served. By then Glen had switched to water knowing he'd have to drive and J.D. was slowly working on his second glass of wine. He had a pretty good idea where this night was going to end and he did not want to be drunk when it did. He did, on the other hand, wanted to get to that point quickly which was why he forewent dessert.

As the men waited for the bill to come Glen calmly reached over and took J.D.'s hand in his. A surprised smile bloomed on the doctors face at that. The older man really wasn't one for PDA. The motion was so distracting that he didn't notice something being transferred into his hand until the Janitor pulled away. Blinking in confusion J.D. slowly opened his hand his eyes widening when he say what it was.

Resting innocently in the palm of the younger mans hand was a brand new shiny key. Instantly J.D. knew that it was a key to Glen's house and that gesture made his heart skip a beat. Were they really ready for that type of commitment?

In truth he was hoping that they'd start to move forward, but this forward this quickly? The only question in the young mans mind was whether or not they were ready to do something this big.

When their relationship started he knew they'd have to go slow. They weren't even friends to begin with. The only thing between them was fear and they had to basically tear down everything they knew about the other and start all over again. Then there was the fact that neither of them had successful relationships in their love lives.

Of course, in the end Glen was the one that took everything to the next level. J.D. wanted this relationship to work out too much for him to pull any of the idiotic moves he'd done before. Anyway, the doctor kind of liked that the Janitor was the one that was taking charge in most things.

"Is this your way of asking me to move in with you?" J.D. questioned with a smile.

"No," Glen smirked, "This is my way of saying we now live together. Your lease is up at the end of the month."

"All my stuff is…"

"Was packed up and brought to my place while we ate."

J.D. looked up from the key only to see brown eyes staring at him with a faux-calm. Deciding the Janitor could wait for his answer the doctor watched him pay their bill and slowly got out of his chair. Everything seemed to move in slow-motion as they walked to the BMW. The doctor could practically feel the uneasiness coming off his lover and felt more powerful then he ever had before.

When they got to the car Glen tried to open the passengers door, but a pale hand stopped him. Brown eyes stared into blue trying to figure out what the younger man was thinking. The men stared at each other in silence before J.D. pulled the taller man into a kiss.

"Glen," J.D. muttered against his lovers lips, "Take me home."

The Janitor's chest rumbled with a growl of appreciation before he brought the shorter man into another kiss. Moaning softly into the kiss J.D. felt himself being trapped against the BMW. Pulling away the older man manipulated his lover into the car before climbing in himself.

J.D. was practically vibrating in his seat hoping the car would go faster, but he knew that would never happen. For everything that had happened in their past the Janitor was surprisingly protective. He did everything he could to keep the doctor safe. It was just another thing that J.D. had come to love about the older man. It didn't hurt that it let him know how much he cared.

"I have to ask," J.D. spoke after a moment, "How did you afford all of this?"

"Been saving up for a rainy day since I started working," Glen answered pulling into his…their driveway.

"And today was that rainy day?"

"No, today was much better."

Smiling softly J.D. kissed his boyfriends cheek and climbed out of the car. The doctor took a moment to look around. The house looked exactly the same as it did before except Sasha was now sitting in the driveway. Of course, that happened whenever J.D. was over, but now this was a permanent place for the scooter.

With slow movements the doctor walked to the front door. The small key felt as if it was burning a hole in his palm. His hand was shaking slightly as he placed the key in its slot. This was it. As soon as he opened the door their entire relationship would change and they could never go back to how it was.

That thought had J.D. wondering if he was doing the right thing. Glen had been so wonderful to J.D. for the past year. There were no pranks, and the teasing was now playful. He dealt with his job, emotions, and with people laughing at their relationship. He didn't have to. He could have called this whole thing off or continued to keep it a secret, but he didn't. It was so…it was the best relationship J.D. had ever been in.

Taking a deep breath he pushed the door open and turned the light on before laughing in startled happiness. There were boxes piled everywhere. All of them labeled and instantly showing his ownership. This was really happening. Glen and J.D. were really going to be living together.

Strong arms wrapped around J.D.'s waist bringing him chest to chest with his muscled lover. A soft sigh came from the doctor as he felt the warmth fill him. Without thinking blue eyes slipped shut as everything that happened that night washed over him. It was so pleasantly peaceful that he didn't even think when the Janitor rested his head on his shoulder as their bodies started to sway together.

"You didn't have to do all of this," J.D. whispered not wanting to break the spell.

"Wanted to," Glen responded, "Wanted to show you it was ours."

"What did you just say?"

"I said that it was ours."

Without warning J.D. pulled him into a kiss while moving them backwards so he was against a wall. The doctors arms wrapped tightly around his lovers neck moaning softly as Glen's tongue pushed past his lips and into his own mouth. The Janitor quickly took control of the kiss drawing the noises he loved from the younger man.

Glen's hands went to the doctors slim hips and pressed as close to him as he could. Gasping against his lovers lips J.D. ran his hands over the gray coat and sighed happily. Both suits were made out of the same material and the doctor couldn't be happier.

The taller man pulled away to let his coat drop to the floor, but stopped when J.D. whined slightly. The younger man wanted to feel the suit. He wanted to feel it against his heated flesh as Glen had him writhing in pleasure. Okay, maybe he really did have a clothing kink.

"Keep it on," J.D. spoke running his hands down Glen's chest.

"Only if you're naked," Glen replied pressing kisses to the younger mans neck.

Sighing happily at the feeling J.D. quickly started to strip. As he reached for his tie though the Janitor grabbed it to stop him. A smirk came to the older mans lips as he pulled the man into a kiss by the tie.

With a growl Glen lifted the smaller man in his arms pressing his back against the wall as his legs wrapped around his waist. J.D. couldn't help but giggle at the movement, but that turned into a deep moan when the Janitor bit at his neck.

Letting his head fall to the side the doctor threaded a hand in the older mans hair pressing him tighter against his neck. His moans grew louder as Glen moved down his neck and chest until he was able to take a nipple between his teeth.

A loud gasp feel from J.D. his back arching towards the brown eyed man. He loved how Glen knew exactly what it took to have him panting and practically begging for the older man.

Glen pulled away from the doctors chest pulling him away from the wall and starting the trip to their bedroom. J.D. leaned forward licking up the Janitors neck until he came to his ear. Taking the earlobe between his teeth he sucked on it gently before pulling back.

"Glen," J.D. whispered into the ear making sure his tongue flicked over it, "You have no idea how wonderful you look like this. So powerful and strong and all mine."

"No," Glen shook his head, "J.D., I…I'm…I love you."

J.D.'s hands froze when he heard those words uttered for the first time. He had dreamt of hearing them for so long, but none of them came even close to what he felt now. Grinning happily J.D. brought Glen into a sweet kiss. Lips moved sensually together until both men pulled away panting.

"I love you too," J.D. whispered while stroking the mans cheek.

Glen gave J.D. one of his rare true smiles that seemed to make him look ten years younger. The sight of him smiling was always breathtaking and the doctor did everything to bring that smile out more often. It was getting easier to do when the men were alone, but it still wasn't something that happened all that often.

"Quit thinking," Glen muttered placing innocent kisses to J.D.'s jaw line resting the younger man on their bed.

"But they're such good thoughts," J.D. hummed happily, "I love when you smile."

"More of less then when I do this?"

Without warning Glen latched onto J.D.'s pulse point and bit down. Arching up a moan fell from the doctors lips. A tongue came out to soothe over the bite mark and travel up to waiting lips. Tongues worked together brining soft noises from both men. J.D. used the kiss to wrap a leg around Glen's waist and flipped them.

Moving down the Janitor's body J.D. ran his hands over the clothed chest until he was even with his trousers. Pulling the belt off he quickly undid the button and zipper before pulling out the erect penis. Placing kitten licks to the side of the dick J.D. traveled down to the base and placed a kiss to one of his balls before taking it into his mouth. He could hear the low groans coming from above him as he lavished the ball with his tongue before moving to the other one.

A hand tangled into the gelled hair and tugged until J.D. broke away and went up to Glen's face. Staring into blue eyes the Janitor raked his nails over the younger mans nipples. Gasping moans broke free from the doctor with each movement. The hands started to pull away so they could travel down to the lithe hips and back around to the taunt ass that he loved.

Feeling the hands on his backside J.D. slowly started to rock against the man. The doctors eyes fluttered shut as he felt the muscled leg still clothed rubbing against his bare skin. The men rocked together gently their lips finding each others once more tongues tangling together.

It was so sweet and slow that J.D. let himself sink into the feeling of warmth. He had no idea how long they rocked together, but before long he felt the hands on his ass slowly start to kneed before a finger ghosted over his entrance.

A sigh fell from J.D.'s lips as Glen broke away fully and opened the nightstand drawer. He pulled out a half used bottle of luck and flicked it open. The Janitor moved to pour the lube on his fingers, but stopped instead. Tapping J.D. on the hip he moved them around so he was straddling his waist the doctor flat on his stomach.

Once J.D. was laying on his back his boyfriend started to kneed the cheeks again. Hums of approval left the doctor throughout the massage. He was so lost in the feeling that he missed the lube being opened once more. He let himself fall further as his cheeks were spread and a well lubed finger circled his hole.

A soft sigh fell from his lips as the finger pushed in. The thrusts were slow as Glen worked him open. A finger pushed in along with the first before long. J.D. spread his legs even further wanting to feel more of the delicious burn. Then a third finger entered him and he let out a soft keening noise.

"Glen," J.D. sighed thrusting back, "Need to feel you."

The fingers were pulled out only to be replaced by Glen's penis. J.D. let out another loud moan his eyes fluttering shut in bliss. When the Janitor was fully inside his young lover he took a moment to get control over himself. Once he was sure that he was back in control he pulled out slowly before thrusting in deeply. A loud keen came from J.D. as he pushed back.

Glen continued this place even as J.D. panted and moaned for more. This was a first for them. Every time before this it had been quick and passionate. All about being together and forgetting the world around them. Both of them loved it that way. It fit perfectly with the kind of relationship that they had held before now.

This showed how much their relationship was changing. They both truly wanted this to grow. Just like the pace of their love making it would go slowly, but they would be deep. True. And they would be doing it together.

Pulling out of J.D. Glen flipped him onto his back and pushed into him once more. Eyes blown black with arousal met as their bodies worked together. Pants and moans grew louder and louder as their movements started to speed up. Glen took J.D.'s hand in his and wrapped them around the doctors cock.

"Glen," J.D. panted his eyes fluttering as his back arched, "Oh…Fuck…Glen!"

J.D.'s body tightened delicious around the Janitor causing him to growl out and thrust harder. Staring down at his lover's face as his orgasm hit him caused Glen to lose control and fall over the edge. Throwing his head back the Janitor let out a silent scream as he came.

"I…love you…J.D.," Glen announced falling onto the bed to avoid crushing the lithe man.

"I love you too," J.D. smiled cuddling into his chest.


	13. Chapter 13

J.D. took a deep breath attempting to keep himself calm. It wasn't very often that they young man lost his temper, but when he did it was best to stay out of his way. Everyone, even Dr. Cox, knew this.

Which was why it was all the worse that the person driving him towards the edge was his best friend. Of course he and Turk didn't always see eye to eye, but they had never really fought about anything before.

Now the doctor wanted nothing more than to punch his best friend in his face. Don't get him wrong he loved Turk, but there was only so much a guy could take before he went off the deep end. That line was approaching rapidly.

It had been four months since Glen and he had told everyone about their relationship. It was difficult at first to deal with everyone's constant comments and looks, but for the most part everything was back to normal.

Carla had been the first to accept it. It was odd for her at first because she thought she had to protect J.D. Then she actually had a conversation with the Janitor and saw that he was the one protecting the doctor. She even helped Glen plan their anniversary.

Dr. Cox continued to be his sarcastic, but silently supportive self. You will never convince J.D. of anything else. He really didn't care that J.D. and Glen were together. Though the younger doctor now knew that the two older men were friends.

Even Eliot was coming around, in an extremely awkward way that only she could pull off. The best part of her finally having a real conversation with her ex-boyfriend was that she revealed that she had gone on a date with the Janitor. They had a lot of fun talking about the dates the couple had gone on.

The only thing that hadn't gone back to normal was Turk. Yes, he was still J.D.'s best friend, but everything had changed. They didn't talk about anything below the superficial level anymore and they rarely hung out outside of work.

Then there was the fact that Turk somehow figured out a way to bring his best friends relationship up. It was never anything positive either. He always was saying something that made it seem like Glen was the worst person on the planet and how none of it was real.

J.D. had known that it would take a while for the surgeon to get used to the idea of their relationship, but this was getting ridiculous. It had been months! He should be able to at least not have to bring the subject up every time they had a conversation.

"I was thinking about your thing," Turk spoke waving his fork at his friend.

"My thing?" J.D. asked staring blankly.

"Yeah, your thing with the Janitor."

"You mean my relationship with the man I'm living with?"

"Whatever. I was thinking…"

"It's not a 'whatever', Turk. Stop acting like this whole thing is going to go away with a wave of your hand."

"I'm just saying there are other people you could date."

"Really? There are other people? I thought you were all ghosts!"

With that thought J.D. got lost in his own mind. It would be awesome if everyone was a ghost. They'd walk through everything and never have to eat. Oh no. If they ended up walking through him.

"So cold," J.D. shivered coming out of his thoughts.

Turk shook his head at his friend. He had gotten used to his imagination a long time ago. Not a lot of people liked it, but it was useful when he wanted to mess with his mind. Which was always fun.

It was one of the things that made him care about J.D. He loved the doctor and all his quirkiness. His life was never boring with the man around and that was something that helped him a lot. Especially back when they were in college and pulling all-nighters every night.

With all of their history together he knew exactly how his friend acted. It was because of that that the idea of him and the Janitor as a couple was just wrong. The Janitor was evil and wanted to hurt the doctor, just like J.D. had always said.

They had been working at the hospital for awhile now and in all that time the doctor never said anything good about the Janitor. It was like the older man was basically incapable of emotions!

And it didn't matter what his wife or anyone else said he knew there wasn't a good bone in that mans body. Why did it seem like he was the only person that was trying to keep J.D. safe? Had the Janitor brain-washed the entire hospital?

"I'm serious J.D.," Turk sighed with a shake of his head, "I can totally find you someone better."

"Only, if I can find you someone."

"Dude, I'm married to Carla."

"What's your point?"

"I love…I love her."

"And I love him. Tell me. What's the difference, Turk?"

J.D. stared at his friend in silence hoping that the man would realize what's he was saying. He was so tired of hearing how horrible and stupid his relationship was. He just had one more person to convince that this was a good thing.

The truth was that he was just so tired. He loved Glen more than anything and he wasn't willing to give up on their relationship by any means, but just how long would he be able to do that when a person that he trusted with everything was fighting tooth and nail against them?

It was naïve to believe that once he found the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with that everything would fall into place. J.D. knew that, but he never thought that he'd have to fight this hard against someone he cared about to save the relationship of another person he cared about.

"I just want what's best for you," Turk tried.

"There is no one better," J.D. answered trying to keep the desperation out of his voice. "Now. Please. Stop this."

"Why can't you see that I'm trying to help you?"

"What can't you see that I love him?"

"Seriously? How could anyone love that?"

J.D. gritted his teeth at that. He hated Turk talking about Glen like he was nothing. No one seemed to understand that the Janitor was one of the best guys that J.D. had ever met and he had met a lot of people in his life.

The surgeon wasn't giving the Janitor a chance. It was the same thing that the doctor had done and he honestly regretted not trying to see past his mask a lot sooner. He knew that Turk would see how truly amazing the man was if he'd only give him a chance.

The blue eyed man had no idea how he was supposed to convince his best friend of that though. He was a very stubborn man and the idea that one day he'd have to choose between the two of them terrified him.

The sad part was he knew that one day that just might happen. He knew that he'd have to choose one day. In the end though he knew exactly what his answer would be if that day ever did come.

"So, what do you say?" Turk smiled, "This weekend? Just the two of us?"

"What?" J.D. asked in confusion.

"I asked if you wanted to come over this weekend. Since Carla is visiting her sister it'll be just the two of us. Like it used to be."

"That sounds fun. I'll tell the Janitor."

"Do you still call him that? 'The Janitor'? Does he even have a first name?"

Sighing J.D. pushed his food away and stared at his friend. This wasn't getting any better any time soon. In fact, it seemed like everything was getting worse as things went on.

"Turk," J.D. shook his head, "This needs to stop."

"What does?" Turk questioned in confusion.

"Constantly saying something degrading about my relationship."

"I'm just telling you the truth."

"No, you're not 'telling the truth'. You're being an ass."

"J.D.!"

"Every comment you make isn't hurting my relationship with the Janitor. It's not making me think that this is a mistake. It's making me upset with  _you_. It's making me not want to be around  _you_."

Turk froze where he was at his best friends words. He never thought that he'd hear those words come from the man. They had been best friends for so long that it seemed like nothing could break them apart.

The idea that the man was willing to throw all of it away for one man was just wrong. There was no way he'd leave J.D. just because of Carla! This was exactly what Turk had been trying to show everyone!

"So you'd leave me for him?" Turk said angrily.

"No," J.D. sighed sadly standing up, "I'd leave you both."

Everything seemed to freeze for a moment. Nothing like this had ever happened to them. Out of everything that had ever happened in their lives the two of them were always supposed to be together. Always supposed to be best friends.

Was Turk really hurting his best friend so much that he was not only willing to walk away from his partner, but his best friend? He was supposed to be helping him see the light not hurting him.

"I knew that you wouldn't like this, Turk," J.D. spoke his voice soft, "I knew that and I still somehow believed that you'd see past everything and be happy for me."

"I want you safe," Turk supplied easily.

"Yeah. I am safe. I am happy. Or I would be if I knew that I had my best friend at my side through everything. I really miss having my Chocolate Bear. Can you tell me when I'll get him back?


	14. Chapter 14

Glen watched as his boyfriend of fifteen months washed the dishes they used for dinner by hand. It was only when J.D. felt like the world was spinning out of control that he did this. He hated seeing the man like this and knowing that he was one of the reasons that the doctor was like that.

After everything finally settled down it was easy to show Carla and Eliot that their relationship was good. Yes, it took a little work to get there, but they came around in a reasonable amount of time. And it helped that their acceptance made J.D. all that much happier. Which helped their relationship more than either had thought it would.

Even if J.D. wouldn't admit it he needed peoples acceptance. At least the people he cared about. Which Glen knew before this all started and he knew how hard the doctor was fighting against everything running through his mind. That didn't make it any less difficult though.

As much as the doctor defended and fought for their relationship it felt like everything was slipping away. He knew he could lose everything because of one man and as much as he fought against everything is felt as if the answer was already made for them.

Turk was different than the others. No amount of words or actions helped him see. He thought he knew the answers and that was that. He should have known that this whole thing was too good to be true.

"J.D.," Glen spoke leaning against the cabinet.

"I know," the blue eyed man whispered, "I just don't know what to do about any of this and I hate that I know that I have to choose."

"Your best friend or your boyfriend."

J.D. shook his head quickly while turning the water off. He had spent the past two months thinking of ways to fix this, but the more he thought about it the more he realized that things were coming to an end. Everything they worked to get wasn't going to withstand having someone so close to one of them hating the relationship.

Everyone knew this and they were all wondering who exactly the doctor was going to choose. In the end though he couldn't do that to either of them and he would never be able to do that to himself either. He loved Glen and Turk so much and there was no way he'd ever be able to pick between them. Then there was the fact that he'd probably end up resenting the one he did choose.

How was he supposed to be able to look at whomever he chose and not know that if it wasn't for them he'd have the other? No, the very idea of doing that was even worse then the idea of simply walking away from both of them.

There were a few problems with that thought though. Mostly came how hard it would be to actually leave them. He loved them both. His best friend and his boyfriend. They both meant a lot to him and he was going to lose them.

Then there was the fact that he had nowhere to go when he did leave. His job was here. His friends were here. He loved working at Sacred Heart. He was going to have to walk away from all of it and he didn't even really have a backup plan.

Why did this have to be so hard? Couldn't, for once in his life, he have just a little bit of happiness? He had worked so hard finally have someone that he loved and loved him back. He just wasn't going to be able to keep it.

"What are you thinking, Scooter?" Glen asked taking a few steps closer to his boyfriend, "What choice are you trying to make?"

"I…I'm…," J.D. started before taking a deep breath and turning around to face Glen, "I'm wondering where I'd like to live when I leave."

Brown eyes snapped to blue when he heard that. Of course he knew that J.D. was having a hard time, but the idea that the doctor would actually leave hadn't even crossed his mind.

Glen continued to think that the doctor was just going to say that he had been friends with Turk for too long for a  _fling_ to get in the way. He thought J.D. was just trying to figure out the best way to breakup with him. At least then he'd be able to continue protecting the man. Even if it was from far away.

The idea that he was going to lose that small comfort did not set well with him. Glen was willing to lose J.D. as long as he was still able to keep a watch on the younger man. Make sure that he had the kind of life that he deserved. Moving away was not the thing the doctor needed.

"I'm not giving in yet," J.D. smiled sadly, "I just don't know what else we're supposed to do. He's not going to stop and I can't walk away from one of you for the other. I have to leave you both."

"If I broke up with you…" Glen began as if it was obvious.

"That wouldn't work. I can't be around you and not be with you. I love you too much."

"Yet you're willing to leave because of him."

"What do you want me to do, Glen? Walk away from him? I can't do that either! He's my best friend. I might not love him the same way I love you but I do love him just as much."

The older man stared at his lover watching the tears he'd been holding back slowly fall down his face. Moving quickly he pulled him close and into a kiss. The idea of J.D. picking him over Turk had bounced in his head, but he knew that was stupid and as bad as it sounded he felt a little better knowing that J.D. wouldn't pick Turk over him either.

Maybe he was right. Maybe it would be for the best if he did walk away from both of them because if he was here Glen would do everything he possibly could to keep the doctor in his life. Still that was not something he would ever say aloud.

"I do love you," J.D. muttered against his lips.

"I love you too," Glen responded pulling back, "We'll figure this out. I don't want to…I can't…I'm not losing you, J.D."

J.D. let out a heartbroken laugh wrapping his arms tighter around the taller man. He always felt so safe and loved in Glen's arms. The idea of having to walk away was not something he ever thought he'd have to do, but he still saw it as the only plan that would work.

"I thought I was supposed to be the positive one," J.D. said holding back sobs.

"I guess you're a good influence on me," Glen answered tightening his hold.


	15. Chapter 15

"Gandhi," Dr. Cox called grabbing Turk's arm, "With me."

The two men quickly moved to an empty room everyone practically jumping out of their way. It was obvious to see the older man was in one of his moods and no one wanted to have that turned on them. Especially if there was already someone he had his eyes on.

Slamming the door shut behind them Dr. Cox fixed Turk with a murderous glare. Normally the older man only dealt with the surgeon because of/through Carla, but now he had other plans. Based off of the l _ovely_ conversation he'd just had to endure it seemed way overdue.

From the very beginning the curly haired man had been watching everything happen from the sidelines. And by 'everything' he meant J.D. and the Janitor's growing relationship. In fact, he had actually put it together before the couple announced it officially.

He could admit that at first, like everyone else, he thought that it was just a ridiculous fling. Knowing their background who really would think that those two would end up together? Then he really started to watch and he saw something that could potentially be beautiful if the couple truly did care about each other. Which was more than obvious the more you watched. To him at the very least.

Maybe he was being a romantic. He'd long ago accepted that he was one, but even with all that bad though he could potentially see he saw the just how good it could possibly end for everyone involved. Still, he found himself rooting for the men to finally succeed in something he knew they'd been searching for. Then the truth came out to everyone else.

At the beginning he did the same thing the couple did and waited for everyone to accept it. He had long gotten used to the idea and had showed them both he was fine with it. In his own way, of course. It was just a good thing that they both seemed to get his message.

Anyway, he waited for his co-workers to get over their shock and see how good the doctor and the Janitor were together. That day took a lot longer than he had thought it would, but it did come. In every case but one.

J.D.'s best friend was still holding on to it being a fling. He knew surgeons were stupid, but this was pushing it. How could the younger man still not see what was right in front on his face? They were a good couple and they were in love. Was anything else needed?

"I just had an interesting conversation," Dr. Cox started talking as though Turk was two years old, "Do you know what happened to be said in this conversation?"

"I don't have time…" Turk spoke attempting to leave.

"Make the time. Now, do you know what Newbie wanted to talk to me about?"

"New…No, I have no idea what J.D. wanted to talk to you about."

"Really? I thought one  _best friend_ would know when the other was thinking of transferring to a new hospital in another state. He was hoping for a good reference and, you know what, once he decides on the hospital I'll give it to him."

Turk's eyes widened almost comically at that. He knew that he and J.D. had been growing apart lately, but he had just assumed that it would blow over and everything would go back to normal. It was just a stupid fight about a stupid guy. Right?

Apparently, he wasn't right. Not if his best friend skipped talking to him in favor of going to Dr. Cox. None of that mattered though. The fact was J.D. was thinking of…No, had already decided on leaving and he had to stop him.

Without a word to the older man Turk threw the door open and went looking for his friend. He did all of this so quickly he missed the smirk on Dr. Cox's face. The red head knew he needed a push in the right direction and the threat of losing J.D. was the perfect nudge.

Turk ended up looking almost ten minutes for J.D. before he found him outside with Eliot and the Janitor. He didn't bother slowing down as he crossed the parking lot and pulled the blue eyed man into a hug.

For the first time in their friendship J.D. actually hesitated before awkwardly patting Turk's back. It was just wrong on so many levels. The doctor gave the best hugs and always gave them willingly and without question. Had he messed up that badly?

"Don't leave," Turk spoke his voice practically begging as he pulled away.

"What?" J.D. questioned looking around in confusion, "How did…"

"Dr. Cox told me. Don't leave, J.D. Not because of this."

J.D. pulled away from the hug, another first in their friendship and glared. Okay, he really didn't like that look on his best friends face, but looking back on everything he'd done to his friend lately he figured his deserved it.

He knew that he'd been hurting his friend, but he'd always thought he was doing it for the right reason. J.D. was a naïve guy. He thought he had the world figured out, but he thought that there was good in everything. It wasn't exactly the best outlook on life for someone like him.

Then he and the Janitor started to date and had actually hidden it from everyone. That was a step closer to the bad side of things. Turk had good reason to be worried about the relationship. He just didn't want his friend to be hurt.

Hearing that he was thinking of leaving though. That was the opposite of what he wanted. He might be suspicious of the whole relationship, but he didn't want to lose his best friend over it. In the end he knew he had a lot of backpedaling to do to fix this.

All of this was done to try to help J.D. though. Okay, maybe there was a better way to do that, but he had thought this would be the quickest. It wasn't like they were actually in love. No matter how many times the doctor had said they were.

It wasn't that the surgeon was homophobic, he'd known about J.D. being bi since the day he met him. No, this had been about the Janitor and all the stories his friend used to tell about the constant abuse he'd endure because of the man.

To Turk it made sense to continue to see the man that way. It was better for everyone. Never in a million years did he think J.D. would not only forgive but start dating him. He thought they'd seen enough abuse cases in the hospital to know that it was a horrible idea.

It didn't matter that there was no proof that their relationship was bad in any way. That was how they all started. He didn't want to see his best friend hurt or in fear and know that he could have helped him in some way.

"Turk," J.D. shook his head, "I told you that…"

"I know what you said," Turk interrupted, "But I never said my peace."

"You've said a lot."

"No, I've never said everything about the reason I acted this way. How many time did you say the Janitor was evil or had hurt you?"

"That was…"

"How many?"

"…A lot. Too many to count."

"How long before you say that again?"

"He's not abusive."

"But you can see where I'd think that. So many cases of abuse come into this hospital and I don't…I can't see you like that."

J.D. let out a sigh while shaking his head. He had a feeling that this was Turk's problem, but he hoped that he'd actually look at what was right in front of him because as much as the Janitor hurt him in the past he knew that he wouldn't again.

No one ever got to see the side of Glen that he did. Hell, he was pretty sure that he was the only person still alive that actually knew the Janitors real name. Something so simply for everyone else was a real show of trust for the older man.

At least that's what J.D. saw. Yes, he'd be the first to admit that the man was weirder than most people, but that was actually a good thing. It made life so much more fun and he was never one to be bored.

It wasn't as if he couldn't see where people were coming from, but he never… That was something that had happened to him in that past and he never wanted to go back to it.

It was then that the doctor thought of a way to fix everything. He truly didn't want to do something like this, but he didn't want to lose Turk and Glen more. He just had to show them a part of his past that he had hoped would stay there.

Biting his lip the doctor made his way to the payphones and slipped some coins in. There was no backing out of this. He was just going to have to man up and do the one thing he never wanted to do.

"Who are you calling?" Glen questioned leaning on the wall beside him.

"My brother," J.D. supplied dialing the number.

"Why?"

"Because we've…He and I…There's something…You'll see."


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is actually still reading this the story will be coming to an end soon.

"Hey, little brother," Dan grinned plopping down in the booth, "Turk."

J.D. smiled slightly at his brothers greeting, but his eyes were locked on the bar where Glen sat. It had been a month since he called the older man, but Dan couldn't get to town until he wrapped up something. Honestly, J.D. hadn't really been listening to the man.

In the time leading up to the meeting things had been even more strained between the couple, if that was even possible. J.D. was just barely holding on to the last strain of sanity he had. He just wanted all of this to be some weird dream and wake up to everything being as good as it was before they decided to tell people.

Then there was the fact that this was actually his brother and the Janitors first meeting ever. As much as the doctor wanted Dan and Glen to meet at some point in time he had hoped it would be under pleasant terms.

Of course, the truth about his past would have come out anyway when they met, but at least then he would be the one in control of the situation and not holding on for dear life.

Okay, so he had never actually planned on telling his boyfriend, or anyone really, about it. Even with it being years in the past it hurt to think, yet alone talk, about. He wanted to forget it completely and just find happiness in the arms of his lover, but Turk had to continue to push.

Don't get him wrong J.D. understood exactly where his friend was coming from, but that didn't mean he didn't hate it. He wanted…He needed everything to be okay though and this was the only way for that to happen. He just hoped that this did help instead of destroy everything they'd been trying to hold together.

Maybe he was being overdramatic, but it was going to change things. Glen had a hard enough time not believing what Turk was saying. What was going to happen once he knew the truth about everything? Would knowing actually push Glen over the edge?

J.D. knew that he was soft and a lot of people thought of him as weak, but he hated them thinking of him as a victim. It was one of the things he hated the most. That was one of the reasons only Dan knew about his past relationship. Now Glen and Turk would both know.

They would think about this every time they looked at him for at least a few months and that was only after he told them what happened. It would be like it was when his brother first found out. He'd once again be treated like a fragile piece of glass. It took almost two years to get Dan back to acting like himself and that was after a very real chance of him ending up in jail.

"Johnny," Dan waved a hand in front of his brother face, "Why'd you call?"

Blinking a few times J.D. turned to his brother and best friend. Dan was staring at him in confusion while Turk looked like he was going to start talking at any moment. Something the doctor didn't want. He needed to be the one that explained all of this.

"I started seeing someone," J.D. finally spoke, "About sixteen months together and moved in together on our one year anniversary."

"Is it that Eliot chick? Because that girl is good in the sack, like really good, but I thought you and her…"

"Dan, please, I need you to be serious here."

Normally it would take a lot more than that to get Dan to sober up, but knowing that he was there about a new relationship must have put him on edge because he quit talking and nodded his head. It really was the one subject that the doctor trusted and counted on his brother for completely.

Taking a deep breath the doctor opened his mouth to explain, but shut it a second later only to try again a few more times. He had to explain all of this to the older man and hope that everything would be alright because there really was no way that he could stop now and convince his brother that everything was fine without some kind of explanation. He just had to actually say the words.

"What have you gotten yourself into, J.D.?" Dan questioned softly looking between him and Turk.

"I haven't…" J.D. started before shaking his head, "I can't…I need a moment."

Moving quickly J.D. stood up and left the bar. The doctors heart was racing as he shakily made his way into the parking lot. Getting to the Janitors van he quickly opened the backdoors and sat down.

Drawing a knee to his chest J.D. tried to calm his breathing and heart knowing that he was on the verge of having a full blown panic attack. Just as he was getting back in control the doors swung open and Dan climbed in making sure the door closed once more.

"Talk to me, J.D.," Dan whispered sitting next to him.

"He's a good guy," J.D. spoke resting his head on his knee, "And I love him."

"But…?"

"Turk. He doesn't trust him."

"Does he have a reason not to trust this guy?"

J.D. sighed before nodding his head. He hated thinking about how things used to be between him and Glen. In his mind it really was in the past, but it kept coming up driving a wedge between them.

Moving closer to his brother J.D. rested his head on his shoulder as an arm wrapped around him. The doctor let his eyes slip shut as he relaxed into the embrace his mind continuing to figure everything out.

After a few moments of silence J.D. started to tell Dan about everything that had been happening. The older mans arm tightened around the doctor the further the doctor got into the story.

Saying Dan wasn't really happy about anything that was being said was an understatement. Based off what his brother was saying this  _Glen_  was not the type of person he wanted his brother to be dating.

"J.D.," Glen started shaking his head.

"He's not that guy," J.D. practically begged, "I know what it sounds like and I know what you're thinking, but that's not it. He wouldn't hurt me like that."

"He's never hurt you or made you do something you didn't want to?"

"Not since we got together."

Dan stared at his little brother wondering how he could still be so naïve. He had to agree with Turk on this one. This Glen guy wasn't going to be good for his brother and the last thing he wanted was to see his brother hurt once more.

Still, looking down at J.D.'s pleading eyes he realized how much this meant to the younger man. He wanted to prove that there was nothing bad going on between the two of them. Which was a good thing.

J.D. had kept almost every single one of his relationships to himself. Besides Eliot Dan couldn't actually say he met one of the doctors ex's and it was only after they broke up that he had met the blonde.

If J.D. actually wanted Dan to met this guy while they were still dating then it was a big thing. He actually saw their relationship going somewhere. He wanted this relationship to go somewhere.

"I want to met him," Dan said pulling away, "Let's get Turk and the four of us can talk."

"Umm…" J.D. swallowed looking around, "We're kind of in his van right now. He was in the bar. I was going to have you met him after we talked."

The parking lot was silent as J.D. and Dan climbed out of the van. Turk was watching from a few cars away while Glen was leaning against the wall looking like he belonged there. As soon as the van doors closed though his brown eyes were fixed on J.D. looking for some kind of answers.

Swallowing roughly he motioned with his head for the older man to come over. With sure movements Glen made his way over not bothering to look anywhere but J.D. He needed to know if his lover was alright.

Ever since the doctor had bought up telling his brother what was going on he had been on edge. Nothing the Janitor did calmed him down and he refused to talk about it at all. Everyday he became more worried about the younger man. Now he was finally going to get the answers he'd been waiting for and in all honestly he wasn't sure he wanted them.

As soon as Glen was close enough J.D. wrapped him in a hug. Usually the taller man wasn't one for pubic displace of affection, but feeling the younger man shaking in his arms had him rethinking his stance. Whatever happened had shaken him up fairly badly for some reason.

"I'm sorry," J.D. whispered holding onto his boyfriend, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Tell me what?" Glen questioned his voice so low the other two men didn't hear it.

Pulling away from the man J.D. took a few steps back so he was standing next to his brother once more. If he was going to talk about this once again he was going to need the mans support.

"Okay," J.D. took a deep breath, "So…Umm…We're all here because I started dating the Janitor and Turk thinks he's abusing me."

"With good reason," Turk interrupted.

"Christopher," Dan shook his head, "Let J.D. speak."

Seeing his best friend not only nod, but the worry in his eyes deepen J.D. thought about how to say everything without having it blow up in his face. It wasn't like he could predict how people were going to react. It was up to them.

As bad as it sounded he was terrified that they were going to blame him. Some days he even blamed himself for what happened. Even after all these years and he knew that was completely idiotic. If he could do that what's to say they wouldn't?

He had seen it happen with other people. They found out and they blamed the victim for everything. And yes, that was one of the things that had been repeated to him over and over all those years ago, but that didn't make it any less true. He just hoped his boyfriend and best friend wouldn't do that.

"When I was younger I dated this guy," J.D. started eyes fixed on the asphalt, "We dated for about five months before Dan saw what was going on. In those months I…They were hell and I thought I deserved every moment of it. He was abusive. In more ways than one and I never told anyone. I couldn't. Dan is basically the only one that knows about it and that's why I asked him to come. If anyone would be able to convince you that this isn't an abusive relationship then it's him. Because I know the last thing he wants is to see me like that again."

Silence filled the space between the men before a pair of sneakers came into J.D.'s view as strong arms pulled him into a hug. Feeling his best friend holding him the doctor held on some of the tension leaving him.

So he didn't lose his best friend and he didn't blame him. That wasn't to say that things hadn't changed in some way, but it was a step in the right direction especially since Dan was pulling Turk away so they could talk about everything that had been happening.

That just left Glen and J.D. The silence stretched awkwardly as the two men stood there. The doctor was doing his best to keep quiet as the Janitor thought, but all he wanted to do was talk long enough for him to forget what just happened.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Glen questioned softly not moving closer to the man.

"You already have a hard enough time believing I want this. What would you have done if you'd known?"

"Protected you."

"From what? There's nothing I need protection from."

"I'm not…"

"You are. I love you, Glen. Okay? I wouldn't have brought my brother and I sure as hell wouldn't have told you this if I didn't. You did notice that Turk had no idea about this? Because I hadn't told him. I hadn't told my best friend about it."

"Why not?"

"I'm not a victim and I'm not fragile no matter what you guys think. I can make my own choices."

"And what's you choice, J.D.? What do you want?"

Moving so he was toe to toe with his boyfriend J.D. linked their fingers together his eyes locking with Glen's. The couple stared at each other for a few moments before the doctor leaned up bringing the Janitor into a soft kiss.

"I want you," J.D. muttered against his lips.

Breaking away from his boyfriend J.D. looked at his brother only to find him glaring at Glen. He wasn't sure, but he thought it was probably a bad thing liking how protective Dan looked right then. He really did like having people protect him.

Dan walked up to the couple the glare never leaving his eyes. If anything Turk said was to go by the whole situation could turn dark very quickly and he wanted to do everything to keep that from happening.

"Dan," J.D. spoke staring pleadingly at his brother.

Dan's glare softened slightly at that. It wasn't that he didn't want his little brother to find someone who made him happy, but seeing him in an abusive relationship once was one too many. If anyone even thought he wouldn't keep his brother safe they had another thing coming. The last guy wouldn't be forgetting that lesson anytime soon.

It wasn't as if anyone could truly blame Dan. He had thought something was wrong with J.D., but he had been sixteen at the time and refused to talk. Not that anything had truly changed. If people really paid attention to what the doctor said they'd realized that he talked a lot, but never actually said anything. It was a defense mechanism.

Sadly Dan had fallen for it. His brother talked about his relationship as if it was the best thing in the world. Never once did he mention the abuse that  _man_  was doling out on him and then there was the fact that he was scarily good at hiding all the bruises that littered his pale body.

The  _relationship_  lasted about five months before Dan found J.D. sobbing on the bathroom floor. It took him a second to calm his mind long enough to realize that the younger man was not only crying and covered in bruises but naked as well. It took Dan hours to finally get the story out of J.D. before he put him to bed.

Once he knew his brother was asleep he tracked down the  _man_. He had been at a random party that night. As it turns out the police get to a scene really quickly when there's ten plus people screaming that someone was going to get killed.

He really should have ended up in jail, but after his brothers testimony as to why he did it, something the older man had refused to do, the judge let him off fairly easily. It was doubtful that he'd be let off that easily again, but in truth he didn't care as long as his brother was safe.

Taking a step closer to the couple Dan let himself look over  _Glen_. He remembered him from his last trip, but he couldn't really remember if he had seen J.D. and him really interact in front of him.

"Dan?" J.D. asked softly.

"I have some off time coming up," Dan started smiling widely, "What do you say to having me stay with you for awhile, little brother? We have a lot to catch up on."


	17. Chapter 17

"I was wondering when you'd come to talk to me," Glen smirked mopping across an empty hospital hallway, "Two weeks is a long time to keep me waiting."

Dan gave me a laugh circling around so he was standing in front of the Janitor. It had been a long two weeks since the younger man came to see his brother. According to him though he was going to be leaving in the morning. Which Glen was going to count as a good thing.

It wasn't that he didn't understand why the man was there, but it seemed like everything was suddenly stalled in his relationship with J.D. The only time they really ever saw each now was when they were sharing the same bed and with Dan staying down the hall there was really nothing they could do.

Still, Glen was doing his best to be patient with it. The man was trying to keep his brother safe and that was something he could respect. Even if he was the one he was trying to protect J.D. from.

It was odd to think though. After almost one and a half years of being together the idea of hurting the doctor was actually something that made him feel sick. This was the man he loved. He was never going to harm him.

No one seemed to understand that though. They all saw him for what he had done in the past and he accepted that. Didn't mean he liked it. Now though there were just two people that had to see the relationship for what it was and one of them was standing right in front of him.

"Leaving in the morning," Glen said leaning against the wall.

"That I am," Dan agreed, "It's a little weird to think I won't be seeing my brother everyday. I'm sure you're happy about that."

"Not happy. Just miss having time with J.D."

"He misses you too. Talks about you all the time."

"Does he?"

Dan nodded his head as he made his way closer to the older man. He looked thoughtful at the moment and that had Glen's heart speeding up. If the man didn't approve of the relationship…He didn't actually even want to think about what would happen.

And wasn't that a fun thought? His relationship with J.D. wasn't the first one he'd been in, but it felt differently than the ones before. As much as he disliked saying it he really thought he could spend his life with the doctor.

How had everything changed so much since he met the man? He hated the doctor and wanted to destroy him. Hell, he'd tried to destroy him, but there was just something about the man. And he knew there were a lot of people that would agree.

Now here they were. A few months off of two years waiting to see if they would actually get to that point. Yeah, like really did throw you through a loop sometimes, didn't it?

"I also talked to some people around the hospital," Dan spoke cutting through his thoughts, "They all thought the same thing."

"What's that?" Glen questioned curiously.

"That when they first heard of the relationship they thought it was a joke."

"Can't blame them there."

"Yeah, but then they continued to say something that was even more interesting."

"Oh?"

Circling the Janitor once more Dan let a snarky smile come to his lips. He wanted the older man to be sitting on the edge of his seat wondering what he was going to say. It wasn't all that much, but it was something.

Truthfully, after hearing everything that the Janitor had used to do to his brother he wanted to hit Glen a few times. Under any other circumstance he would, but this wasn't a normal situation. His brother was dating the guy and he still wasn't really all that happy about that.

"I don't like you, Glen," Dan almost growled, "I really want to beat you a little."

"Should I be preparing for that?" Glen cocked his head to the side.

"No. The other thing everyone kept saying was how amazing a couple you two were together. How they actually wanted a relationship like yours."

Glen's lips twitched up slightly before he was back to his blank expression. It was amazing how relieved he felt by that. Seemed like they were finally going to be able to move on in their relationship and he already had some ideas.

"Don't hurt him," Dan glared harshly, "Don't ever hurt him."

"I don't want to hurt him," Glen said truthfully, "It's the last thing on my mind."

"Good. I should go. Got a dinner with my little brother before a leave."

"It was good to meet you, Dan."

Dan gave the Janitor another smirk and shook his hand before turning and leaving the hallway. Once the was on the elevator Glen let out a soft chuckle knowing that things were finally back on track. He really couldn't wait to see his boyfriend and celebrate the news.


	18. Chapter 18

"Stop," J.D. laughed loudly as he was tossed onto the hotel bed, "Come on, Glen. You know how ticklish I am!"

A deep chuckle resonated through Glen's chest as climbed onto the bed next to his lover an arm wrapping around him. How did he get so lucky? Though maybe the better question was how did he make sure to keep this? Because the idea of waking up alone again was just wrong. He loved being with J.D. too much to let that happen.

Here they were though. It was their two year anniversary and they had an entire week in Olympia, Washington. No cell phones, no friends, and most importantly no hospital. It was just the two of them.

It was an odd thought though. That they had made it two years. No one had believed it let alone themselves. Never before had the Janitor been so glad to be so wrong about something and they would continue down this path.

At least that's what Glen hoped. He had been doing everything to keep them together. Even with how hard it had been he had to admit that it was a hell of a lot easier than he had first thought. Which was saying something.

Without realizing it the older mans grip loosened enough for the doctor to turn around. Blue eyes raked over the Janitor's face before a soft hand directed his face towards his own until their lips pressed together. Slowly the doctor drug Glen's thoughts back to him, back to the situation.

That was something that was absolutely amazing to him still. He didn't like forgetting about the world. It was one step too close to not having control. No, he liked having control too much to do that. Still, with J.D. it was about as close as he would let himself. And who could blame him? This was the man that he loved more than anything. Some rules were meant to be broken with those you loved.

"You okay?" J.D. questioned running a thumb over Glen's lip, "You kind of spaced there."

"Don't worry about it, Scooter," Glen answered pulling the doctor against him, "One week."

"Yeah, one week. Just the two of us. Whatever shall we do?"

Smirking Glen pulled the blue eyed man into another kiss. He could feel the full lips twitch into a smile against his own before tilting his head to the side. The Janitor cupped the back of the doctors head to keep them together. It was such an addicting feeling.

"Glen," J.D. sighed staring lovingly into the brown eyes, "I have an idea."

"Oh?" Glen asked pulling back.

"Move back until your back is resting against the headboard."

The older man gave J.D. a confused look, but did as he said. Once he was in position the doctor tapped his knee until he spread his legs. J.D. settled with his back against Glen's chest leaning his head against his shoulder. A content sigh came from the younger man as strong arms wrapped around his waist.

The younger man linked their fingers together squeezed tightly only to laugh when Glen squeeze back. This was it. This was the life he had always dreamed of. Maybe he had never dreamt it with the Janitor, but he'd never regret it. Two years and it was still the best thing to ever happen to him.

"Teach me sign language," J.D. suddenly spoke.

"You want to know ASL?" Glen questioned in confusion.

"I've seen these hands destroy and I've felt them bring pleasure. I want to see them create something."

Chuckling softly Glen moved so he was cradling J.D.'s hands and started to form the letters of the alphabet. It wasn't much, but he could see the look of wonder and happiness in those blue eyes even when they weren't directed at him. Yes, he could get used to this.

The Janitor spoke in low tones as he manipulated the doctors fingers. It was odd, but for once J.D. wasn't talking. He was so focused on their hands that everything just seemed to fade into the background.

The younger man had spent a lot more time watching those hands. He knew what they felt like running over his body. What they felt like as he sucked and licked at them. What they felt like as they stretched him open. What they felt like circled around his cock. He loved those hands.

All those thought filled his head as he watched. His mouth started to water his heart speeding up. God, he wanted those hands on him. Mapping every inch of his body making him moan and scream.

A smirk came to Glen's lips as he felt his boyfriend start to squirm. It wasn't hard to figure out what the younger man was thinking and there was no chance that he wasn't going to…indulge those thoughts.

Leaning closer to J.D.'s ear the Janitor lowered his voice as he continued to explain what the signs meant. A hitch could be heard in the doctors breathing arousal coursing through his body his dick hardening in his jeans.

"You okay there, J.D.?" Glen asked feigning concern, "You seem… _tense_."

When Glen said the word 'tense' his hand dropped into the doctors lap giving the hardened member a quick squeeze. Dropping his head back a moan tore through J.D.'s body as it arched into the hand.

A whimper of disappointment escaped him as the warm hand moved from his lap and was splayed over his stomach. That was one of Glen's favorite places on J.D.'s body. He loved to suck bruises there. Letting his imagination run with that thought his breathing started to pick up once more.

The hand started to rub small, slow circles into the skin his nails scratching over it periodically. Sighs of contentment came from J.D. his hands coming down to rest on the Janitors thighs moving them in time with his lovers.

Seeing J.D.'s eyes slip shut Glen's smirk widened his hands moving up his body coming to stop at his nipples. The blue eyes flew open a gasp of surprise coming from his lips when the nails scratched over the nubs.

Moaning lowly the doctors head lulled to the side leaving the Janitor to lean down to run a tongue over the bared neck. Soft noises continued to come from the younger man as Glen gently nibbled on a spot just under his ear.

J.D.'s hips started to thrust forward trying to find some friction only to remember his hands were free. Reaching over he tried to open his jeans, but his hands weren't steady enough. With a chuckle Glen took pity on his boyfriend and with a flick of his fingers had the button was undone and the zipper was down. It was a move that had a loud whimper coming from the younger man.

"One would think you had a thing for my fingers, J.D.," Glen spoke his voice barely above a rumble.

"Do," J.D. gasped out as a hand pulled him out of his underwear.

"Oh? And what do you like about them?"

"Glen…"

"Tell me what you want them to do. Come on, J.D., use your words."

"My…My dick."

Glen out a soft sound of agreement the tips of his fingers slowly running up and down the length. The movement had the doctor whining and attempting to thrust up. Shaking his head the Janitor wrapped an arm around the younger mans waist to stop the movements.

"Glen!" J.D. practically growled, "Please!"

"What?" Glen asked, "What do you want?"

"Jerk me off. Pl-Please. Need your hand!"

Chuckling softly Glen took the doctors dick in his hand and started to jerk slowly his thumb brushing over the tip every few times. J.D. let out a frustrated noise his hands going back to Glen's thighs nails digging in his entire body practically vibrating.

"More! God, Glen. Please!" J.D. cried out.

"I thought this was what you wanted," Glen teased, "Was I wrong? Or do you want something else?"

"Please, need…"

"Need what? What do you need?"

"You. Need your fingers in me!"

Removing his hands from his lovers body Glen watched the doctor move away and pull off his clothes. Brown eyes raked over the newly revealed skin before reaching down to take himself out of his pants.

"Suck me," Glen ordered.

J.D. eagerly got on his knees and pulled the Janitors cock in his mouth. Glen let himself get lost in the warmth of his boyfriends mouth. Those plush lips around him. His tongue circling him.

Reaching behind J.D. Glen circled his finger around his hole feeling the skin flutter under his touch. The Janitor pulled away to grab the lube he had in his pocket and got his fingers ready.

Pushing a finger inside his boyfriend Glen felt more than heard J.D. moan. He worked the finger in the lithe body his eyes never leaving the younger man who had reached up to start fondling his balls.

Before long three fingers were in J.D. causing pleasure to course through his body. He wanted so badly to come, but he knew that he had no chance of that until Glen had himself.

With his free hand the doctor started to pump the part of his lovers cock that he couldn't reach. Groans started to come from the older man his fingers thrusting harder into J.D.

Working back on the fingers J.D. thrust against the bedspread his eyes slipping shut as he got closer to orgasm. Scraping his teeth against the underside of Glen's dick as the Janitor let out a groan his cum shooting into J.D.'s waiting mouth.

Swallowing down the cum J.D. rolled onto his back when Glen's fingers slipped out of him. His hand reaching down to wrap around his dick tugging on it bringing himself over the edge.

The couple laid on the bed gasping for breath for awhile before the older man moved slowly to pull his clothes off. Once he was naked he got them under the covers and J.D. curled into his chest.

"Do you remember any of what I taught you?" Glen questioned his eyes slipping shut.

"Some of the alphabet," J.D. answered, "Maybe."


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is actually still reading this the story will be coming to an end soon. Almost done! Another small chapter. I really am running out of things to write.

"Okay, that's it!" Eliot suddenly screamed causing everyone in the hallway to spin and look at her, "Oh, shut up! You know you want to know too."

J.D. watched as everyone around them nodded their heads in agreement,. He continued to look around waiting for someone to speak up about whatever it was the blonde was talking about only to notice that everyone's eyes were locked on him. Suddenly the doctor had a noose around his neck and everyone was wearing judges robes. Except for Eliot who had an undertakers outfit on.

"I'm innocent!" J.D. yelled coming out of his daydream.

"And engaged," Eliot snarked glaring at him, "It's been a week since that ring appeared on your finger and no amount of the Janitor asking to keep it quiet is going to keep me from finding out how. Now. Spill."

J.D.'s mind emptied his eyes widening almost comically as Eliot spoke. As soon as the words 'ring on your finger' slipped from her lips the doctor was focused on his hand. On the ring finger of his left hand rested a platinum band with a series of stars carved into it.

The rest of her words slowly slipped into his mind. A week? He had this ring on for a week and he hadn't noticed? Alright, so it had been really busy being the beginning of flu season and all that, but he usually wasn't that oblivious. Was he?

And then there was the fact that no one had told him. That Glen had specifically asked, or threatened in some cases, to keep it a secret from him. There was a freaking engagement ring on his finger and no one thought he needed to know!

Handing the chart in his hands to a random intern J.D. made his way to Glen's van knowing he'd be there. Sure enough there the taller man stood laughing at something Randall said. Like there was nothing else going on in the world. That nothing had changed at all. Least of all something as big as this.

Making his way over the doctor looked towards Glen's hands, but they were in his pockets. J.D. got right in front of his boyfriend and pulled his hands out of the pockets his heart pounding over what he saw.

A ring matching his own rested snuggly on the Janitor's finger. A gasping breath fell from J.D.'s lips at the sight. Is this…How could this have…What the hell was going on?

Tears welled in the blue eyes the situation finally fully coming to light. Everyone had been treating him differently all week, but without anyone saying anything and no one trying to hurt him he ignored it. He really needed to start paying attention to his surroundings.

"Who broke?" Glen questioned staring at their hands.

"Eliot," J.D. mumbled, "Wanted to know the story. I didn't even know there was a story, Glen."

"Let me tell you."

Nodding his head J.D. let the Janitor lead him through the hospital until they came to the on-call room where they had sex for the first time. Glen locked the door behind them before sitting them both on the edge of a bed.

"When I came in here two and a half years ago I wanted to kick your ass," Glen spoke keeping their hands linked, "I thought it was all a joke. I never thought we'd end up here. Three months ago I saw that ring when I was shopping. I couldn't stop seeing you wear it so I bought it. I spent weeks trying to figure out how to ask you.

I thought I figured out the perfect way, but I wanted to make sure I got the right size so I put it on you one night. I couldn't bring myself a take it off and in the morning I thought you'd see it, but you didn't. It was almost like it had been there all along. I convinced everyone to leave it alone. I was still waiting for you to notice."

J.D. stared at the older man in shock. He couldn't believe that he had done all of that, but mostly he couldn't believe he wanted to marry him. How many times had the brunette thought of this moment in his life? Now it was finally here and it was so different than he imagined.

He had imagined marrying men and women over the years. There were so many different ways it could happen, but never before had he thought of this. For everything that he thought he really wasn't disappointed at all. It was very Glen.

"J.D.," Glen's voice cut through his thoughts, "You haven't said anything."

"You haven't asked anything," J.D. whispered.

A smirk came to the Janitor's face before pulling J.D. into a kiss. Their lips worked together slowly making wordless promises to each other. When they pulled apart the doctor had tears on his cheeks that Glen brushed away.

"John Dorian," Glen moved so he was on one knee, "Will you marry me?"


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The 'tragedy' part of the story is about to start coming up. So be prepared.

"Don't worry, J.D.," Turk said pacing the length of the dressing room, "There's nothing to be nervous about."

J.D. opened his mouth to point out that he wasn't nervous, but thought better. The surgeon had been pacing for the past hour and with the wedding ten minutes away it looked like he was actually speeding up. How was that even possible?

While it was true that the doctor wasn't nervous he wasn't completely sure Glen was going to show up. It wasn't that he doubted that the Janitor loved him, but this was a huge step and maybe he was thinking that it was too big.

Not that it was too big. It was the right pace for their…thing. Right? Yeah. They were a few months past the three year mark and getting married was the next logical move when you were in love. It all made perfect sense.

And they both wanted it. Spending the rest of their lives together. Everyone watching as they tied the knot. It was everything the doctor had dreamt of when he thought of his future.

The only odd thing was how strange the Janitor was acting. It was almost like he was walking on eggshells around J.D. and he had no idea why. They were almost always on the same page when it came to what they wanted. Was that really going to start changing now?

It wasn't hard to figure out that they weren't exactly similar in a lot of ways. Though they did their best, and almost always succeeded, to make things work. Who was J.D. kidding? It was amazing that they got to this point. It wouldn't be all that surprising if Glen didn't want to get further than what they had.

The doctor just wished that there was some way to tell if he was going to get his heart broken today or not. He knew that if Glen wasn't there when he walked down the aisle he would be devastated.

Sighing the doctor moved away from the mirror and fell into a chair. His heart was pounding angrily as he thought over everything that was going to change in the next hour.

He wanted to spend the rest of this life with Glen. He really did. The older man was the love of his life, but…This wasn't just about him right? No, this was about what both of them wanted. That's why he was feeling all sweaty. Because he wasn't sure if Glen wanted this too.

"J.D.," Turk waved a hand in front of his face, "You're not really nervous are you?"

* * *

"Was not expecting that," Dr. Cox joked staring at the Janitor.

"Not expecting what?" Glen questioned fixing his cufflinks.

"You in an actual suit, Jumpsuit."

Glen smirked at the red head while turning to face him. The doctor had his normal look of amusement on his face. And if it was anyone else Glen would looked just as amused about the whole situation. This was his wedding day though and the only thing he was feeling was a wonderful apprehension.

They had ten minutes until the wedding started. Ten minutes until he and J.D. walked down the aisle and said 'I do'. Ten minutes until he was officially married to the man he loved. Ten minutes until they started the rest of their lives together. Ten minutes.

"You're not nervous," Dr. Cox questioned, "Are you, big guy?"

"Were you nervous when you married your wife?" Glen fired back.

"Yes, but I hate Jordan and much as I love her. Anyways, you're not getting a wife. You're getting a Newbie."

The Janitor couldn't help but chuckle at that. J.D. was so very different than anyone else. It was part of the reason marrying him was such an appealing idea. He knew who Glen was. He knew just how odd he was and could be just as odd when he needed to be. They never had to hide.

Glen had thought that would make everything easier for them, but ever since he asked J.D. to marry him he felt worried. Saying that J.D. was afraid of commitment was an understatement.

The younger man had been even more skittish than normal lately. He wasn't pulling away or starting fights with the Janitor, but there was something almost hesitant about the way he was acting. Something Glen was sure he hadn't noticed.

As strange as it was Glen hoped that it wasn't going to affect their wedding. He was more than willing to wait for the doctor, but he wasn't sure how J.D. would react if he suddenly got cold feet.

"He's a good kid," Dr. Cox said softly breaking through his thoughts.

"I know," Glen nodded.

"Good. Because if you hurt him I'll have some new organs for the hospital."

* * *

"J.D., tell me you're not that stupid," Turk glared, "Are you actually thinking of leaving?"

"What?" J.D. questioned offended, "Of course I'm not."

Turk and J.D. stared at each other before the surgeon shook his head and looked away. He couldn't believe that was actually about to defend the Janitor, but he was actually starting to see what everyone had been saying.

The older man was crazy, no one could deny that, it was just part of who he was. For years he had shown everyone exactly how much damage he could do with that crazy and he had focused all that energy at one person. J.D.

Okay, so Turk hadn't actually believed that the Janitor was out to get his friend, but who would? Some of the stories that he had told were just so insane that no one would have been able to pull them off. Then J.D. told him that they were dating. Well, everyone knew how he reacted to that.

Now he was actually looking at the couple for what they were and not what they had been. He still wasn't completely happy about everything, but he wasn't going to fight it.

For all the years he'd know the doctor he had watched him destroy every relationship that he'd been in, and he'd been in a lot of relationships. This was the longest one and the happiest he'd seen him. He couldn't let the man ruin it.

"I know you," Turk sighed sadly.

"What's the supposed to mean?" J.D. asked confused.

"You think you don't deserve this. Don't deserve him."

J.D. opened his mouth to argue with the surgeon, but stopped seeing a pointed glare shot at him. Pouting he started to mess with his tie once more hoping his friend would drop it.

He knew that this was odd for him, but it wasn't him that they needed to be worried about. It was the man he was marrying. Well, hopefully he was going to be marrying him. Who knew.

Wait, how did he suddenly became the bad guy? It wasn't like he was going to leave. He loved Glen with all his heart and marrying him was everything that he had wanted. Wasn't it?

Part of J.D. was so completely confused though. He loved Glen. He really did, but…At the end of the day was this really what was supposed to happen? Was this where they were supposed to end up?

As bad as it sounded he could still hear that this shouldn't be happening. That no one would actually want anything to do with him. That all of this was just some dream and he'd wake up crushed.

"Do I?" J.D. asked tears gathering in his eyes, "Do I deserve him, Turk?"

Turk stared at his friend before pulling him into a hug. He knew that his friend was insecure, but this was ridiculous. Today was his wedding day. It was supposed to be happy and full of love. Not questioning if he deserved to be loved by the man he'd been with for three years.

"J.D.," Turk spoke staring into his friend eyes, "You deserve to be here. You deserve to marry the man you love."

"How can you say that?" J.D. tried to shake his head, "You hate him."

"But I love you. I want you to be happy and he makes you happy, doesn't he?"

J.D. looked down at the floor thinking back to the past three years. He had been happy. Happier than he thought possible. Sometimes it was hard to believe that any of this was actually happening.

"More than anything," J.D. smiled shakily.

"I promise you that this is a good thing," Turk smiled back, "You deserve love, Vanilla Bear and you have it. Enjoy. Now, get your ass out there and marry that man."


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry it took me so long. My laptop got hit by a wicked bad virus and erased everything! It's going to take awhile longer for me to post the following chapters. I am working on it though! Sorry for the inconvenience.

"Hello," J.D. whispered watching as Glen's sleep filled eyes fluttered open.

Glen gave the doctor a small smile a hand coming up to card through the un-gelled locks. The Janitor loved waking up and seeing J.D. before he did his hair. It was one of the most beautiful things he got to see.

The Janitor pulled the doctor into a kiss letting it say everything he felt. They had officially been married for a little over ten hours and everything had turned out better than either had ever thought.

Honestly, the wedding was beautiful and everyone had fun. That wasn't the best part though. No, that came in now. Waking up to the person that they loved and knowing they had decided to spend the rest of their lives together. It was an amazing thought.

J.D. pulled back long enough to smile only to be tugged back to his husband. It was perfect. Just the two of them for an entire week doing whatever they wanted to and there was a few things that he wanted to do.

Throwing his leg over his husbands waist J.D. settled on top of him never breaking the kiss. Nervousness slowly started to creep up on the doctor as he thought over what he wanted. It wasn't that he thought Glen would turn him away, but they had never done this before.

It wasn't until he heard a groan come from the older man that he decided that he wasn't going to back down. Reaching over J.D. threaded his hands with the Janitors and slowly brought them up to pin them over their heads.

Brown eyes opened in shock only to be met with unsure blue. Leaning up Glen gave J.D. a soft reassuring kiss before letting him takeover once more and do whatever it was he was thinking of.

The Janitor watched his husband slowly work up the courage to do what he wanted. It was always a treat watching the doctor. The looks he got on his face just as he thought of the most brilliant ideas was something to hold. That look was especially amazing when it was brought out in bed. And it was all for Glen.

J.D. trailed one hand down Glen's arms and onto his chest. There was a light amount of hair there and while that wasn't something the younger man every really found himself attracted to there was something about it on Glen that had his heart speeding up.

"Keep those there," J.D. ordered as he slide down his lovers body.

A shiver of excitement run up Glen's spine when he heard a voice he'd come to love deepened with lust ordering him around. He wasn't apposed to hearing more of that any time the younger man thought of sharing it with him.

The doctor stopped moving when he was in front of his husbands bellybutton. Running his tongue slowly over his lips J.D. nuzzled against the muscles placing small kitten licks to the skin.

Glen moaned softly his eyes slipping shut as he let himself get lost in his lover. J.D. had been called innocent and sweet by many people in his life and the Janitor was sure none of them had ever taken him to bed. No one would mistake him for innocent again if they saw him like this.

Trailing his tongue up the older mans body J.D. let his tongue roam over ever inch of skin he could. The dips and curves of his abs. The peaks of his nipples. They were all his and they tasted like the most delicious dessert he had the honor of tasting.

Glen's head tilted back when J.D. moved up to his neck giving him more skin to taste. The doctor stopped at his collarbone placing sweet kisses to the skin before biting into him.

Brown eyes flew open feeling those teeth buried into his skin. Maybe they had never been truly sweet in their love making, but this was different than anything they'd done before.

"J.D.?" Glen questioned looking down at his lover.

"Shh," J.D. licked over the bite mark, "It's okay."

"You bit me."

"You've bitten me before."

"You're not me."

"Oh Glen..."

Moving up J.D. drug the older man into a kiss his tongue darting in and taking over the Janitor completely. Without thinking Glen's arms came down to wrap around the doctors neck only to have J.D. pull away from him.

"I can be so much worse," J.D. whispered in his ear before taking it between his lips and sucking.

Glen let out a loud groan at the younger mans words. How had the man that never took charge turn into this? He needed more. He needed J.D. to do something.

Making a soft shushing noise J.D. sat back on his heels rubbing his hands over the muscled chest below him. He could feel each labored breath, each erratic heartbeat, his husband made. It was intoxicating.

J.D. didn't do things like this. He was the person that was people did this to. He was in control. He had the power right now. A shiver raked his body at that thought. He could do anything right now and Glen would love it.

"Turn around," J.D. whispered climbing off the older man long enough for him to do as he said before moving so he was straddling him once more.

Sweet kisses were littered on Glen's shoulders as J.D. slowly rocked against his body. Soft, warm hands massaged into taunt muscles working to relax the older man.

It wasn't a highly known fact, but J.D. had taken a few classes to get a degree as a masseur. He did his best to make it so no one knew that, but now... Now he was going to pull every stop he had ever learned.

Moving back J.D. balanced himself over his husband working his fingers into the Janitor feeling him relax with every movement. Glen's hips started to roll into the mattress causing the doctor to smirk.

Soft pleased noises came from the Janitor that grew louder as J.D.'s hands moved lower. His fingers stopped on Glen's ass kneading the flesh before pulling the older mans cheeks apart.

A low groan came from J.D. as he looked down at his husband. This was the first time he had ever seen him like this and he couldn't help but want to taste. Dipping down his tongue ran over the fluttering hole bringing a groan from J.D. as the flavor burst on his tongue.

"J.D.," Glen panted.

"You always take such good care of me, Glen," J.D. whispered, "I love you so much. Let me take care of you. Please, Glen. Please."

The last word came out as a whisper while J.D. pressed a kiss to the hole before he started to lick at it. Glen tucked his knees under him while spreading his legs trying to get more of that delicious feeling. He never knew J.D.'s tongue could be so wicked.

It had been years since the Janitor had had someone do this to him. Low noises fell from his lips when the doctors tongue started to push into him. The tongue tortuously wiggling inside him before thrusting in and out of him.

"Oh fuck," Glen gasped pushing his hips back, "J.D. More."

"You taste so good," J.D. moaned pulling back to lick his lips.

Resting his hands on Glen's lower back J.D. started a slow roll of his hips. It wasn't enough for the Janitor. He needed the younger man inside of him, but every time he moved to get that the doctor moved away before completely stopping altogether.

Closing his eyes Glen let out a disappointed noise and waited for his husband to do something. When nothing happened he turned his head and looked back. J.D. was sitting on his heels staring at him in wonder.

With a loving smile the doctor leaned down and kissed his husband. Their lips worked together, tongues twisting before J.D. pulled away and pulled a bottle of lube from the nightstand.

Slicking a finger up the blue eyed man kept his eyes locked on his lovers as he slowly pushed a finger inside him. Glen groaned at the pressure. He really had missed this feeling more than he he realized.

The finger moved just as slowly as his tongue had. Circling his finger J.D. started to work it in and out of his husbands body his dick twitching listening to the noises the Janitor made.

Glen hadn't known the doctor could be this much of a tease. Neither of them ever wanted to wait when they got in bed. To have the younger man suddenly want this was surprising to say the least.

It was hard for the Janitor to just lay there letting J.D. do what he wanted. Part of him wanted to say fuck it, flip over and ride the doctor into oblivion, but he wanted to see what would happen just as much. The answer came to him as another finger slipped snugly into him.

"You-You're not ma-making this ea-easy," Glen ground out his hips thrusting back.

"Would you?" J.D. shot back giving a twist of his fingers.

Before the older man could say anything J.D. pushed three fingers inside his husband driving all thoughts from Glen. He watched the muscled back waiting to see when he found the mans prostate.

When the body below him gave a sudden jerk along with a long deep moan J.D. knew he had found what he was looking for. Setting a harsh pace the doctor made sure to hit that spot every time drawing intoxicating noises from the man below him.

Feeling Glen squirming J.D. let out a breathy laugh. This is what it felt like to take someone apart. To have them turn to putty in his hands. No wonder the Janitor loved to do this. It was powerful being able to do this. It didn't hurt that the older man looked absolutely sexy like this.

It wasn't long before the younger man felt his control snap. He needed to know what it felt like in his husband. Pulling his fingers out J.D. quickly slicked himself up and moved to enter his husband only to freeze.

This was it. All he needed to do was push into him, but he couldn't stop staring. This wasn't just some random person he was going to date for a few weeks then dump. This was his husband. This was the man he was going to spend the rest of his life with.

"I love you, Glen," J.D. whispered slowly pushing into his lovers body.

Glen let out a gasp as the younger man sank into him. Feeling him in his hands and mouth was amazing, but he seemed so much bigger inside of him. It was such a pleasurable stretch.

Burying his head into the mattress the Janitor pushed back trying to get J.D. to move. Chuckling softly once more the doctor set a tortuously slow pace wanting all of this to last.

"J.D.," Glen moaned when J.D. completely stilled.

"What do you want, Glen?" J.D. questioned rubbing his hands over his husbands back, "Tell me what you want."

"You."

"You have me. Come on, just say the words."

"Fuck me!"

Hearing the need in Glen's voice J.D. couldn't help the groan that he let out as he thrust into the willing body. He set a quick pace his hands gripping the older mans hips as he used him.

Pants and moans echoed through the hotel room competing with the sound of skin slapping together. Reaching behind him Glen grabbed at J.D. until he had a handful of that full, taunt ass he loved so much.

J.D. angled his hips just right thrusting all the more firmly into his husband. It was pure bliss he felt as he tossed his head back. A hand moved around to the Janitors front taking his penis and matching the pace of their fucking.

"Fuck, J.D.," Glen moaned, "So good."

Hearing his husbands moans J.D. sped up his pace while leaning down to place nips and kisses along the broad shoulders. Glen's noises grew louder spilling his seed between them.

Feeling the Janitor tightened around him J.D.'s hips stuttered moving all that more harshly into the willing body until he was filling the older man. He kept thrusting in him until he felt the blissful exhaustion fill him causing him to pull out and roll to the side.

The men laid there panting until Glen rolled onto his back his ass clenching wanting to keep J.D.'s cum inside him. Looking over at the younger man the Janitor couldn't help but smile at the blissful look he had.

Gathering the doctor in his arms Glen dragged him into a kiss. The lips worked together slowly until J.D. pulled back his blue eyes lovingly staring into Glen's.

"One week," J.D. whispered, "Everything we'd ever dreamed of."

"We should get started," Glen smirked, "Because I have some ideas, Princess."


	22. Chapter 22

"Jumpsuit," Dr. Cox greeted opening his front door, "Should I expect Newbie next?"

"He doesn't know I'm here," Glen responded walking into the apartment when the ginger stepped aside, "Don't think he'd look here anyway. Not for awhile."

The doctor cocked an eyebrow at his friend before going to pour two things of scotch. The Janitor was a rough person on a good day, but it seemed different today. Shaking his head Perry started to hand the cup to the Janitor only to stop and take in his appearance.

Saying the brunet looked like crap was an understatement. Going back the ginger poured more alcohol into the glass and handed it to the lost man. With a small nod of his head Glen took a sip before letting out a sigh.

The Janitor had come to the doctors to hide. That much was obvious to Perry. While it was easy to guess that he was hiding from his husband he had no idea what could have been done to make him hide.

The couple had been officially married for a little over a year and a half now and everything seemed to be going well. He knew of a handful of fights the couple had been in, but nothing that would cause hiding. It made no sense.

Though it was unlikely there was a possibility that the doctor had been wrong. That the men had been hiding the problems they had. Looking at the Janitor that thought seemed to confirm itself even more with each passing second.

"You want to explain why you're drinking all my alcohol?" Perry questioned when Glen poured himself another glass.

"No," Glen easily supplied.

Taking the bottle out of the Janitor's hands Perry leveled him with a glare then waited. As much as the doctor hated talking about anything to anyone he wasn't going to let something ruin the couples marriage and not try to help at least.

It didn't take long for Glen to finish his drink and place the glass down a look of defeat in his eyes. That was a look Perry never thought he'd seen on his friends face.

Glen always seemed to have a plan or three. He was a lot smarter than he let anyone believe. There was part of the ginger that thought maybe the Janitor could have ended up working as a doctor at the hospital if he had wanted.

"I overheard J.D. and Scary Nurse talking," Glen finally spoke.

"What could they have possibly said to turn you into this?" Perry questioned.

"J.D. wants kids."

Perry stares at the Janitor silently before placing the bottle in front of him once more. Glen looked thankful as he poured himself a drink once more knowing he wouldn't be able to get himself home now.

The doctor watched his friend for a moment thinking back to all the times he'd seen him with children. He couldn't think of an incident where either he or the child seemed upset in any way.

"You're an idiot," Perry sighed shaking his head, "You know that right?"

Glen rolled his eyes at the doctors words. He hadn't come to his friend expecting kind words, but had hoped for some quiet and the ability to get drunk without being questioned. Just a few hours of blissful silence. He knew he shouldn't have gotten his hopes up.

"J.D. would make an amazing father," Perry offered in a low tone.

"He really would," Glen smiled softly, "I keep seeing him spending hours organizing tea parties or learning how to throw a ball so he can teach our child how to throw a ball. He wouldn't be able to put the kids to sleep because he'd end up riling them up whenever he read them a story. He'd end up baking chocolate chip cookies every other weekend. He makes the best chocolate chip cookies."

"You've put a lot of thought into this haven't you?"

Glen gave a dark chuckle at the doctors words. All he had been thinking about for the past six hours had been J.D. fathering a child. At first the images of J.D. with a child had brought a smile to the Janitor's face.

That was until he really started to think about it. J.D. would do amazing at being a parent, but himself? That was a totally different story. One that he wasn't very happy thinking about for every long.

No one could ever say that he was normal by any means. He never had been even when he was a kid. He had gotten used to that, worked to make people see that side of him, but he was an adult now.

Sadly, it was now that he really got to think that he realized J.D. was his first real relationship. He was going to be hitting his mid-life crisis soon and he just started to have a real relationship. None of that sounded good for raising a child.

"Thought you liked kids?" Perry asked when the Janitor said nothing.

"I do," Glen agreed.

"And they like you?"

"They do."

Perry ran his hands through his hair a few times trying to push his headache away. He was never really good with advice and it was easy to see that the Janitor was upset. He couldn't say the wrong thing.

"What is the problem then?" Perry ground out.

"You have met me right?" Glen glared, "Do you actually think anything good could happen if I had the chance to raise a child?"

The doctor stared at his friend in silence for a moment before pulling the man up and off the couch while grabbing his keys. It was saying something that the Janitor didn't fight him as he dumped him in his car.

Perry could only think of one thing that could actually help this situation. He just had to hope that the younger men were up for whatever was about to be thrown at them.

"Dr. Cox?" J.D. questioned opening the front door, "What are you doing here?"

"Talk to your husband, Newbie," Dr. Cox said motioning to his car, "Figure this out."


	23. Chapter 23

"Is this how the world works?" J.D. questioned staring at his husbands reflection, "Is it really this shitty?"

"J.D.," Glen started reaching out to him.

"No. I just...Don't."

The Janitor slowly brought his hand back to him his heart breaking as he watched his husband stare through the glass. He knew there was nothing he could do or say to help the younger man yet his mind was racing to do just that. How had a walk through the park turned into this?

Six years of being with the younger man, three years of marriage, and never before had the Janitor seen the doctor look like this. It didn't help that he was covered in blood.

Still it was his eyes that were getting to the older man. Those young, soulful, naive eyes looked nothing like the ones he fell in love with. No, those blue eyes looked empty. It was not a look Glen liked.

How was it possible for his lover to changed into this? Yes, he understood that the situation was a difficult one to deal with, but for J.D., the sweetest, most open-hearted, innocent man, to act like there were no emotions in him was terrifying to say the least.

"Come on," Glen whispered pulling his lover towards the showers, "Let's get you changed."

"I don't..." J.D. started trying to pull away.

"You're standing in front of the NICU covered in blood. You need to shower and change."

Wrapping a hand around J.D.'s arm Glen pulled him towards the showers. The Janitor hoped the shower would snap the doctor out of it, but as he began to strip the clothes off his husband he saw no change.

A feeling of desperation filled the Janitor. This was the man that he loved and he had no idea what he was supposed to do to help him. It wasn't as if this was a common situation.

Going with the first thing that popped into his mind Glen took his clothes off as well before getting them both into the shower. Turning on the water he waited to see if the cold water would have any affect on J.D. but he barely reacted.

When the water finally heated Glen picked up a clothe and slowly started to bathe his lover. The lithe figure stood there only moving when the older man forced him.

Seeing that nothing he was doing was working the Janitor thought back to everything he had learned about psychology from around the hospital. When nothing came to mind he thought he needed to pay more attention.

Felling more useless than ever before Glen reached to take J.D.'s hands in his own only to have them violently pulled away from him. The sudden movement had both men freezing, but that soon changed as the doctors knees buckled.

The Janitor was easily able to catch the younger man, but he did nothing to stop them as they slid to the shower floor. J.D. latched onto Glen's neck sobs shaking the doctor hard enough to affect his husband.

"How?" J.D. gasped between sobs, "How could...Why did...?"

"I don't know," Glen answered kissing the top of his head, "I don't know, J.D."

"She was only 23."

"I know."

"She was pregnant."

"I know."

"I could have...I should have..."

"You can't blame yourself."

J.D. ripped away from Glen at that. Moving at an impressive speed the doctor was out of the shower and starting to get dressed. As he started to pull on his shirt a strong hand pulled it away.

A shot of anger had him glaring at the older man. He wanted nothing more than to hit the Janitor something that J.D. had rarely felt in his life. He wasn't a violent person, but right now he felt like he needed to do something.

"It wasn't your fault," Glen spoke slowly.

"It's my job to heal the injured," J.D. almost screamed throwing his hands up.

"It was too late for you to save them both. She said save her son. You did."

"Yeah and now he's parent-less!"

"You couldn't have stopped that."

"I should have..."

"Should have what? Suddenly become psychic? Seen the future? You said it yourself. She was already sick. She might have had a better chance of living if she was in a hospital, but there was no guarantee that either of them would have made it. It's lucky that one of them had survived."

J.D. tried to keep a hold of his anger, but the deep, soothing tones of his lover had him swallowing roughly as he was pulled into a hug. It wasn't right that an innocent, soon to be mother had to die. It just wasn't right.

Sighing the blue eyed man cuddled into the muscled chest of his husband and took a deep breath before pulling away and attempting a smile. Glen saw this and moved to cradle his face before bringing him into a soft kiss.

It seemed to help comfort J.D. some because when he pulled away once more the light was starting to appear in his eyes once more. Kissing his husbands forehead Glen helped him get dressed once more.

"What happens now?" J.D. questioned once he was dressed.

"We do what we've been talking about," Glen shrugged.

"Do we...Are you saying...?"

"We adopt a son."


	24. Chapter 24

"Come on, Sam," J.D. soothed rocking the infant in his arms, "It's okay, Day Day's got you."

Glen stood in the doorway of his sons bedroom watching his husband try to put the sick child to bed. If it wasn't for the loud wails of the boy and the almost desperate please of his husband he'd love this scene.

Sam had been an official part of their small family for three months making the small child nine months old. The adoption process was harder than the Janitor expected, but the end result was worth all the troubles.

That little boy was amazing. He brought something that the Janitor hadn't even known he needed. He had thought that J.D. had filled whatever gap was in him, but then Sam came into his life.

As odd as it sounded he was just like J.D. His smile lit the room up and he loved laughing. He also loved to be held. The blond was happiest when he was in one of his fathers arms. Sam was just a happy child and Glen loved him with all his heart.

He had thought about children before now, but he never thought that it would be true. Now he had a picture of his son and husband in his wallet. He wasn't showing random people or anyone really that picture though. He'd leave that to J.D.

Then there was how the baby had changed his husband. It was hard to believe the doctor could be any more loving then he was yet everyday that was exactly what the Janitor saw.

The doctor would spend every free moment he had with Sam. Reading books and playing with different toys. Glen wouldn't tell how many times he'd gone into this room and seen his husband fast asleep in the rocking chair their son in his arms.

He had never seen J.D. look as happy as he did whenever he was holding their son. Holding Sam was the one thing that always calmed the doctor down. It was weird to think that they almost didn't have this.

Glen had been terrified about the idea of being a father. The idea of messing up a child as badly as he was kept him up more nights than he liked to admit. His husband though had refused to believe that would happen.

It was still so surprising that the younger man had such faith in him. Glen still couldn't believe that the younger man had give him a change after everything he'd done, but he wouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth.

In the end it all brought them to this moment. Sam had started coughing last night and saying J.D. had been terrified was an understatement. After calming their son down from his crying the doctor told Glen permission to get them an appointment by any means.

In the end it turned out to just be a cold, but J.D. was still on edge. Every cough or sniffle from the toddler had the doctor jumping up to check on him. J.D. had barely sat still for more than five minutes all day.

All Glen wanted was for his son to be healthy and even knowing it would take more than 24 hours for that to happen the Janitor was still expecting the worst.

"You should be sleeping," Glen spoke when Sam finally started to quiet, "You have work in the morning."

"I don't want to leave him," J.D. whispered staring down at Sam, "What if he..."

"He has a cold, J.D. He'll be okay."

"I've seen a cold kill people before."

"That's not going to happen, J.D., but you have patients that need you at your best. Go to sleep. Sam will be fine."

J.D. looked like he wanted to argue, but was interrupted by a yawn. Nodding his head the doctor laid his son in his crib before letting his husband pull him into their room.

"Dr. Cox said this would happen," J.D. yawned once more tugging off his shirt.

"Doctors make the worst patients," Glen replied climbing under the covers, "They're even worse when their child is sick."

J.D. gave a soft laugh joining his husband in bed. Curling against the older man J.D. rested his head on the muscled chest his fingers drawing random patterns.

Blue eyes slipped closed as calloused hands started to rub his back. The doctor could feel himself slowly start to relax into his husband only to hear his son cough once more.

"Stop," Glen whispered kissing his forehead, "I can take care of him. You go to sleep."

"Glen," J.D. started to shake his head.

"I can take care of my son, J.D. Go to sleep."


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how this says tragedy? Yeah, that would be where this starts. I am sorry. I had to do this though. It was the plan from the beginning. Sorry!

"Daddy?" Sam questioned for the sixth time that hour his eyes trained on the front door.

J.D. sighed at the two year old's behavior. He was supposed to be in bed an hour ago, but every time the doctor tired to even pick him up Sam would scream as loudly as he could. He finally gave up hoping his son would tire himself out.

Sam was convinced that he couldn't go to sleep until his Daddy got home though. It was their routine. Glen was always there to put Sam to sleep and J.D. was always there to wake him up.

They had done this since they brought the little boy home and after the first time everyone knew better than trying to break their schedule. No one wanted to see the little boys blue eyes staring up at them in disappointment.

Dr. Cox had actually gone out of his way to make sure that their routine wasn't interrupted. There were times that there were emergencies that J.D. couldn't get out of, but those didn't happen often.

It was so weird how the older doctor seemed to help the couple more than anyone else. Don't get J.D. wrong Turk and Carla and Eliot helped a lot as well, but for some reason he seemed to go to Dr. Cox most often.

And his son loved him and Jack. Every weekend Sam and Jack ended up playing at the park and now that Jordan was pregnant again the blond was beyond happy. He kept asking if he got to be a big brother too.

It was really something to see when Sam would run up to the ginger bouncing up and down until he was picked up. The little boy loved his Uncle Perry and Jack.

J.D. was still best friends with Turk and he still hung out the with man more often than anything, but he was getting closer to the older doctor. It was odd to think of Dr. Cox as a friend, but he wasn't complaining.

"Daddy?" Sam repeated his daring to his Day Day, "Daddy home?"

J.D. tried to give his son a reassuring smile, but it was getting harder and harder for the doctor to control the worry that was filling him as well. He had to keep calm though.

Knowing that his husband was so late was putting J.D. on edge. It wasn't helping that his son would look over at him like the world was falling apart every few minutes. What made it worse was there was nothing J.D. could do.

A voice in his head kept telling the doctor that he should be worried. That he should call Glen or the hospital and figure out what was going on, but he couldn't do that. Not if he wanted to keep Sam relatively calm.

"Sam, baby," J.D. spoke carding a hand through his sons hair, "Come here."

"No sleep," Sam shook his head with a yawn.

"No, no sleep. Just cuddles."

Sam stared at his Day Day for a second before nodding his head and letting himself be lifted. Cuddling into the older mans chest the toddler let out another yawn. He was fighting so hard against sleep though that was all he wanted. He needed his Daddy though.

J.D. laid back letting his son blanket his chest a hand coming to rest on is back to keep him steady as the other raked through the soft blond hair. A low hum started in the doctors chest knowing it would help bring Sam to sleep.

The doctor kept the hum up until he heard his sons breathing even out. Letting out a deep breath J.D. looked over at the clock on the wall and felt his heart beat skip. It had now been two hours since Glen was supposed to be home.

Closing his eyes the doctor tried to push away images of the Janitor in some horrific accident, but he couldn't. Glen would never disappoint his son like this. He loved him too much. The only reasonable conclusion was that something horrible had happened.

The doctor felt tears start to stream down his face his teeth biting into his lower lip to stop sobs from falling from him. He couldn't let Sam know something was wrong until he was completely sure of it himself.

J.D. ended up falling asleep on the couch still waiting for some kind of news. When his eyes finally did open it was the the sound of knocking on the front door.

Moving slowly J.D. stood up and laid Sam down only to have the blue eyes sleepily open. For a moment J.D. thought of trying to get the child back to sleep, but he knew it would do no good.

Taking a shaky step towards the door J.D. swallowed back the bile in his throat. He had to keep calm. He couldn't let his emotions drive him until he knew what was going on.

The door opened to reveal Turk and Dr. Cox a pink box in the surgeons hands. J.D. opened his mouth to tell them that this joke wasn't funny. Instead a sob erupted from him. Without saying a word Dr. Cox pulled J.D. into a hug as Turk lifted the toddler up taking him back into his room.

"I'm sorry, J.D.," Dr. Cox whispered rubbing his back slowly, "We did everything we could."


End file.
